#i KNOW this comes from an insecure place within me of not being as good as socializing
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hwnglx · 1 month ago
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pick a pile - what makes you beautiful? (detailed)
hello dear reader! let's take a look into what makes you so uniquely beautiful. breathe slowly, take your time and use your intuition to go with the pile that speaks to you the most. this is a very specific reading, so it's likely that not every message will speak to everyone. remember to take what resonates, and leave what doesn't. 𓆩♡𓆪
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✰ pile 1 ✰
so, this pile definitely gave me the biggest boss vibes. you have very strong energy, with so much major arcana in my spread. i can tell you are not someone to be messed with. (also kinda feel like you might parent or coddle the other piles lmao)
your beauty lies not only within your immense strength, but also in your ability to stand over situations which can appear very dark and difficult on the outside. i do believe you come with your own struggles, insecurities, doubts and fears which don't seem to always find their way to the surface; but you deal with them in such a graceful and impressive way. i can feel some people being in genuine awe of how you handle trials and tribulations. i do think you've been through certain things which have given you thicker skin. now, you know what you want and need in life, you're aware of your potential and what you can do, so even if a situation presents itself in which you find yourself in self-doubt, you believe in the power of hard work and consistency.
you don't seem like the type to dwell on your problems for too long or allow yourself to drown in self-pity, but moreso like a person who feels this desire to work on whatever troubles you. let's say if a situation presents itself to you, in which circumstances seem unfavourable; rather than complaining or remaining stuck in this hopeless place, you'll likely be the type to think about how you can change and work on your own attitude and mindset instead, in order to come out the other side in a stronger manner. you put a lot of importance into remaining confident and keeping a grip on your self-belief. since you see that as the best version of yourself. you appear to be very mature; even if your age is still young, you seem to have a wise soul and an impressingly reliable, as well as responsible nature. maybe you had to grow up quickly, you just give off this energy of someone who had to learn how to be responsible in life very early on.
considering i got both, the emperor and the empress for you, i think a lot of your beauty also lies in your duality. you're likely to have this balance of both feminine and masculine qualities inside of you. you seem to be the type of person who can be assertive, more self-centered and individualistic in some ways, like you do think it's important to focus on yourself in order to find fulfilment in this world. however this doesn't distinguish the compassionate heart you carry for other people. you're someone with an empathetic and kind nature, someone who wants to take care of the people you love.
you could make a very good parent, actually. i think you balance this sense of responsibility, dependability and solidity, with a nurturing heart, a soft and gentle core. you might be the case of someone with a hard shell but soft interior. i feel like you're the type to root for the underdog. someone who takes people under their wing, protects them from external influences. like you'd take a bullet for the people you cherish. (i do think you might be more selective in that aspect though, like you do have your boundaries straight, and wouldn't just throw your hand in the fire for anyone)
this is a random message i got; some of you also might be on the curvier side when it comes to your bodily built, and it makes you very very beautiful. like i can tell that some of pile 1's bodies are bangin! like yes sir or ma'am, go rock that bod with confidence!
another very beautiful thing about you; you do not fear getting your hands dirty. meaning, you're willing to put in the necessary hard work in life. like “if i have to personally run up this hill for several hours straight, then so be it, as long as i finally get to the top!” you aren't someone who will shy away from bearing burdens and heavy weights on your back, you understand the need to hustle in order to succeed. you can feel this need to improve yourself, put in the required effort to keep getting better at everything you do in life. not just for yourself, but also the people around you. you want to be a comfortable and stable figure in your loved one's lives.
i keep feeling like you're just this person people can lean on with no second thought; someone who will have their back no matter what. very loyal, dedicated and passionate energy within you. i'd personally love to be your friend, like i'd feel pretty lucky! i feel like you're the friend who keeps their promises, who's okay with running errands for others. you'd get things done for someone if they're unable to do so; like e.g. picking your friends up and driving them random places. maybe you're the friend at the party who holds themselves back from drinking in order to be the responsible one making sure everyone gets back home safely. you just seem to have this devotion to the ones you love, and wanting to make them feel safe, as well as cared for. you might also be a huge hype man in their lives, always cheering them on and lighting up any dark place they find themselves in. you have such bright and inspirational energy!
you carry this beautiful balance of; focusing on your own interests, ambitions, desires and goals, but also remaining considerate and caring towards the special people in your life.
✰ pile 2 ✰
oh my gawd, this pile is super cute. so, you immediately strike me as someone very independent and freedom-loving. you love to have your own space, and being able to just do whatever you want, whenever you want. i feel like you just have this very contagious and bright energy, where people might trust you to make the best out of every situation you're in. you seem like a big risk-taker, someone who doesn't fear the concept of change, and isn't afraid of starting all over again if you feel like that's necessary. you're so beautiful, in the way of just being down and ready to do things others might shy away from. you might be the person who will drag your friend out the dark and quiet room and tell them to get out, enjoy the beautiful sun on your skin, connect with mother nature, appreciate the smaller things in life and find happiness in them, because that's where true fulfilment lies. there is this very philosophical and poetic side to you. i keep feeling like you might have significant neptune/jupiter/mercury aspects.. i can just see you running through the blooming fields in this almost movie-like way. (random but do you like ghibli movies? you just give me ghibli character vibes, especially kiki's delivery service 🥹 i love that movie, it's so comforting)
you're beautiful in the way where.. you easily see beauty in the world. you seem so easily excitable, and count all the blessings you have in life. i feel like you're the type to find something positive in everything and everyone. random, but you might love photography, and taking pictures of almost everything around you, just because you can see art in anything or any place. you love exploring new places, new cultures, understanding and learning about people or things completely different to what you're used to. you might like to travel, because you enjoy this thought of getting insight into entirely new lifestyles. you're very open-minded.
you aren't worried about leaving toxic people or situations behind if you feel like they just keep you in a negative place. it's kinda giving been there done that. i think you consciously reject negativity now because you're not at that same place anymore, and especially don't want to be anymore. you're so overly protective of your peace now, because you had to deal with so many tribulations, and took so much on the chin from life in order to get to this place of inner peace. you don't allow anyone to take it away from you anymore.
you also don't seem afraid to completely transform. maybe you even enjoy transforming yourself physically, like you love reinventing yourself and can find your identity in things like your fashion. you enjoy expressing your unique nature in that way. i also just feel like you're such a pleasure to be around, people likely just enjoy your presence because it makes them feel like everything will be okay. did anyone ever tell you about how your presence is therapeutic to them? if not, some people might think that without openly expressing it.
i do think you can be very emotional too, which is another beautiful trait of yours. you might be the type to tear up rather easily, i think your interior is very squishy and sweet. you wear your heart on your sleeve in this beautiful and special way. you not being afraid to express your emotions (although sometimes they can just take over you unintentionally lmao dw i relate..) makes you so extraordinary, it gives you this unique light and glow. don't ever lose grip on this wonderful side of you. don't ever feel ashamed of it, and don't allow anyone to make you think you're anything but beautiful for your passion! i feel like you genuinely care about the world, and everything that it involves. your energy is just so pure and innocent in a way, even if you yourself don't see yourself that way. your intentions and heart read as very sweet.
in addition, your beauty lies in your ability to see opportunity of growth in whatever life throws at you. like pile 1, i do believe you have had to deal with your fair share of challenges in life, but this lead to you being able to see how.. even situations that might look awful from an outsiders perspective, can serve you as a learning lesson. “what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.”
again, you're just so philosophical! i feel like we could just sit down together and discuss life for hours, in such a deep and intriguing manner. you seem to have a lot of understanding of the different complexities of life, just because you've experienced a lot of situations in which you had to adapt or adjust. so there's this natural know-how here, it's almost like you're not scared of life's upheavals anymore. you didn't let it discourage you at the time, so best believe it will not bring you down at this point in time. you're so youthful and almost childlike in spirit, but carry a deep sense of knowledge about life. like some other people might turn all bitter if they went through what you have been through, but you remained soft and sweet in this harsh world, which is such a beautiful trait to have! i sincerely applaud you, and hope you can never lose this truly wonderful spark inside of you.
✰ pile 3 ✰
oh, this pile seems so genuinely nice, but i can sense some struggle here too.. first of all, you read as a very humble and down to earth person. like i truly can't sense a single ounce of arrogance inside of you. you feel like you're an eternal student of life, continuously learning with every experience, and growing endlessly. you give off this energy of someone who's always so eager to expand your skills and knowledge on things. especially if you get hooked on something like a fun hobby, you're just so ambitious and approach the learning process with this modest, but determined attitude. you seem quite capable of dealing with constructive criticism, and take it as a way to further better yourself. like yes tell me what i did wrong, so i can improve. definitely a very hard-working and earnest energy within you.
you're so beautiful, because you live and lead with this sense of compassion and acceptance inside of you. you seem to have high emotional intelligence; as well as a lot of empathy for others. you're the type of person to.. hold this cup filled with love, in a crowd full of people fighting each other. while other people are overly competitive and at each other's throats to win over the other, you seem like the one who prefers seeing everyone as equally worthy of praise, equally lovable, equally deserving of respect. i truly don't see you enjoying to put yourself above others, simply because you don't see why you would want to. like i don't think you fully understand this need to argue and cause problems with others, it irks you.
you even might put other people's needs above yours almost naturally, it seems to come very easy to you. (did some of you grow up with a lot of siblings? i feel like there's this natural tendency to supress not only your own desires, but also your own emotions a lot.. i feel like you might've found yourself in plenty of situations where you needed to swallow your pride, bite your tongue, ignore your own emotions or grant others chances you yourself might've wanted.) you might be the type to politely hold the door open for people even though your arm hurts, offer the seat to the elderly even though you yourself are exhausted, allow your friend to grab the opportunity although you might need it just as much.
i do feel like you're quite peace-loving, and don't enjoy arguments at all. you seem excellent at approaching conflicts and problems in, not only this calm and collected manner, but also with this diplomatic and tender sense of understanding towards all parties. do you have any major libra placements? i can sense this beautifully non-judgemental energy in you, where you always seek harmony, no matter what situation you find yourself in. you also just seem balanced in general, and like not much can tick you off. some people might even ask you “how are you always so calm?” although i feel like you can experience feelings quite intensely once they take over you (i feel like you might cry a lot when you're on your own..) you just don't enjoy openly displaying your emotions, and might have problems expressing them outwardly. again, i keep feeling like this likely stems from a deeply rooted place, maybe you've just naturally aquired this mechanism within you, where you shut off your emotions and internalize them a lot.
you might put a lot of thought into how others view you, might dislike the thought of anyone looking at you as overly dramatic. you also seem pretty perfectionistic, especially in closely managing the way you're perceived by people, or the way you treat people. you might often fear doing them wrong, or overstepping any boundaries. i can sense an avoidance of expressing or asserting yourself strongly again here, because you just don't want anyone to feel like you're doing too much. (i know this is a reading that focuses more on positives, but spirit is telling me this selflessness in you makes you immensely beautiful.. maybe you even have a lot of egocentric people around you, therefore your kindness just stands out even more. don't lose that sincere heart you have for others, however; you need to listen to what you yourself want more as well <3 learn to balance these two sides in you out, because if not, others might take advantage of you)
i do think though, that a lot of this calmness might be a result of your maturity. it's interesting because on the one hand you can feel like the young student who still believes they have so much to learn from life, but at the same time, you do have a lot of valuable advice to give to people, just because you might relate to a lot of the things others go through. you seem amazing at putting yourself in someone else's shoes, i can feel people thinking you're a great listener.
i just feel like your unique beauty lies in this gentle, pleasant and mild energy you bring to the table. you'd be the type of person i could tell my deepest darkest secrets to comfortably, and i feel like you wouldn't mutter a word to anybody. like your friends probably can tell you the wildest sht they've done, without any embarrassment. or call you at any given moment, and you'd be there to listen to their angry rants or rages, and just take it all in quietly.
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iwantabatlleaxe · 2 years ago
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Ah. Im not gonna lie Im feeling jealous.
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sugoi-and-spice · 11 months ago
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Vox Relationship Headcanons
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Time to strike the iron while the hyperfixation is HOT!
(I mean come ON . Look at this fucking evil dork. I love him).
SFW
It goes without saying that Vox is HUGE on appearances. He does not make his relationships public lightly. His brand as one of the V’s after all is perfection, and he’s not going to go out arm and arm with a person unless they know that.
That being said, especially given his on again off again relationship with Valentino, I could absolutely see him as being the type to fall for a hot mess. 
A very different person with his partner in front of and behind the scenes. When the cameras are off, he’s warm, affectionate, and vulnerable. He’ll share his every insecurity with you, strip himself bare to the bone for you to love and comfort truly and honestly. And he’s an excellent listener too, always available to hold and talk through any problem you have. Your problems are his problems — you’ll work through them together.
When in the public eye however, he can be a downright prick — putting everything, and I do mean everything between you two on the backburner to keep up appearances. He will not hesitate to make jokes at your expense if it means his ratings will go up.
Fights with him are explosive. No, he’s not the type to lay a hand on you, but we’d be lying if we didn’t admit that he can scream at you within an inch of your life.
Words of Affirmation and Gift Giving are his primary love languages. Specifically, he needs words of affirmation and he loves to give gifts. And holy shit does he give the most uncomfortably lavish gifts. Diamonds, rolexes, new cars — no price is too high for his darling.
Surprisingly, he prefers home dates. Watching a movie on the couch or having a little game night with a bottle of wine. He does genuinely enjoy the authentic time you spend together and he wishes he could have more of it, so the more he can get of that private, intimate time together, the better.
And while he is a man of the future, so theoretically should like video games, I do think he has a certain soft spot for a good old-fashioned board game.
When it comes to video games though, he does tend to gravitate to phone games. 
Vox is from the 1950’s so I do think he prefers a more nuclear family and relationship dynamic. He wants to bring home the bacon and have his partner ready to fry it up in a pan with a dirty martini ready and waiting for him. That being said, he is a man that always looks to the future as well, so he’s by no means above doing chores of his own. At the end of the day, this desire for more traditional relationship roles really comes from a place of needing to be doted on rather than any views he actually has about gender.
The man’s a sucker for a good massage from his partner. This wired up workaholic has knots that you can’t even imagine, so please, offer him a nice bankrupt at the end of the day. He’ll be sure to return the favor tenfold.
A very lovey-dovey drunk. Oh my GOD, he’s so touchy-feely and weepy and just all the y’s. You want a guaranteed cuddle-wuddle session? Load him up with a couple glasses of scotch — you’ll have those chords coiling around you.
And yes, his alcohol of choice is scotch. Scotch, dirty martinis, or a nice oaky chardonnay.
This man wants to get married. Yes, even if he is in hell, the idea of not having to worry about who his next lay or source of connection will come from, having someone that will stand by his side through thick and thin, a partner? Now that’d be the (after)life.
NSFW
BIG fucking praise kink. This man NEEDS you to stroke more than just his bod and his cock, he needs you to stroke his ego too.
“God you’re so good”, “FUCK, you’re so big”, “Nobody can make me feel this way but you, Vox”.
Don’t worry, it’s not just for his own ego. He loves to give praise as much as he receives it. This man is a TALKER in the sack.
“Fuck, fuck yeah. Just like that, baby. You’re so fucking good, just like thaaaaat.”
He’s also got a little bit of a degradation kink — but in general, it still feeds into stroking his own ego. Loves to tease and taunt his partner once in a while about what a horny little slut they are, how he loves to see them so desperate and pathetic. Asking his partner, “you’d have anyone right now, wouldn’t you?” just for them to assure him that no, nobody but him will do.
On that note, the man can dish out degrading dirty talk, but he can NOT fucking take it.
Very much a switch. Sure, he loves to fuck, but he’ll just as happily let his partner bend him over his own desk and fuck the shit out of him. A good orgasm is a good orgasm, his ego may be big, but not big enough to get in the way of that.
Big fan of bondage, both on his partner and himself. There are few sights better to him than seeing his partner bound and shibari’d in his own cord and wires, holy shit. But he’ll also never say no when his partner breaks out their own pair of fuzzy handcuffs for him.
He absolutely short-circuits when he cums, so watch out. Sometimes, if he cums hard enough, he may just zap you a bit so watch out.
Favorite position is seated cowgirl. He loves the way he can hold his partner close while ramming as deep into them as possible. Not to mention the fact that either one of them can take over control at any moment. He can thrust up, they can grind down — it’s just the best of all worlds. Not to mention you can do it from his desk chair.
On that note, he’s a big BIG fan of cockwarming. 
LOTS of precum. This HD motherfucker is just a weepy mess.
I can’t explain why, but Vox just seems like an ass man to me.
He’s not necessarily a cuddler after, but he is something of a “savor the moment” kind of guy. He likes to lay in bed (or chair lol) with his partner for a good while afterwards, smoking a cigarette, reveling in some post-nut clarity conversation, just really taking in the moment. His life is so busy at all other times honestly, always looing and speeding to the future. Sex and post-sex are the times where he really does just like to stop and live in the moment.
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katsu28 · 4 months ago
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Hi, I really like your writing! I had an idea for a fic with Lando. He left school really young (he got tutored privately afterwards according to wikipedia) and mayhaps that could make him feel insecure or something along those lines if he has a significant other that is in university, maybe studying to get a bachelors or masters degree. School is not everything and does not accurately measure intelligence or anything else but it is still a standard that most people hold and compare themselves too. It's something that I know all to well, which is where this idea came from. Whatever you do with it thank for reading it!💖
thank you for trusting me with your idea <3
lando norris x reader, r is in an unspecified master's program, 1.5k.
Lando loves how smart you are.
He tells you all the time. When you’re stressed from the intensity of your master’s program, nervous about an exam, or most of the time, just randomly. He’s proud of you for taking on something he definitely doesn’t have the brains for, and for absolutely crushing it so far. 
He left school before even completing his GCSEs in year 10, just so he could focus on racing full time—a decision he’d never regret, but always wondered about.
What would his life have looked like if he hadn’t devoted it to pursuing a career in racing? Would he have finished secondary school? Made it to university?
He doesn’t even know what he would’ve studied. 
Granted, he was never really good at school to begin with, but things could’ve changed. Now don’t get him wrong, he would never change a thing, but that didn’t mean he never thought about what might’ve been. 
So yes, Lando loves how smart you are, but if he’s being honest with himself, it does make him feel a little insecure about his own intellect.
-------
Lando finds you in your workspace when he gets home from padel with Max. 
He’d turned one of his guest rooms into a sort of office slash study space for you when you moved in with him all that time ago, a place where you could get your work done in a quiet environment whenever you needed to. The space itself was one of the smaller rooms, but still bigger than you were used to, and decorated to perfection too. 
A standing desk with an ergonomic chair (better for your neck and back, he’d said, so you weren’t hunched over your books all the time), a smart blackboard on one wall for any necessary brainstorming, a comfy chair in another corner—all overlooking the Monte Carlo cityscape from massive floor to ceiling windows. Everything else has been up to you, but Lando wanted nothing but the best for his smart girl. 
He pads in silently, making his way over to where you're furiously typing at your computer to press a kiss to your cheek. You flinch a little, startled out of your own world at the action. Your eyes fly to his, wide, before your posture relaxes again. 
“Oh, hi! Sorry, I didn’t hear you come in,” You breathe, giving him a short kiss on the lips this time. 
“Didn’t mean to make you jump like that, darling. My bad,” He chuckles. He leans over your shoulder, squinting at the diagrams on your screen. “What’s that?” 
“Oh, it’s—” You pause, flicking through a few pages of the textbook next to your computer. Your lips twist to the side in thought, and then you smile at him in what he’s sure you meant to be an assuring way. “Nevermind, you probably wouldn’t get it.” 
He knows you don't mean it as a dig or anything, but the brush off ignites a bitter taste on his tongue. And if there’s one thing about Lando, it’s that he feels everything extremely strongly. “Well I’m sorry, not all of us can be geniuses.” 
“Pardon?” You look genuinely stunned at his outburst, at this huge 180 degree turn his mood has taken within the last few seconds.
Then he can't help the words tumbling out of his mouth next. “I get it, alright? ‘Lando doesn't know what I’m talking about, let’s make Lando feel dumb!” 
He storms off before you can process his stinging words, but even then, the anger that had just flared up in him has already dissipated. Lando knows all of it comes from a place of insecurity, that little nagging feeling at the back of his brain telling him that even though he’s happy where he is, happy doing what he does for a living, he could’ve made something different of himself. 
You leave him alone for a while before coming to find him, presumably to let him cool off. He feels awful about what he said now. Honestly, he hadn't even meant to say it out loud, doesn’t know why he said it. It’s not like he meant it. 
A knock from the doorway of the bedroom draws him out of his guilty thoughts, and he looks up to see you hovering just behind the threshold. He hates how you look hesitant to approach him. 
You press your lips into a thin line once his gaze meets yours. “Can we talk about what just happened?” 
“It’s nothing. Just forget I said anything.” 
“It’s obvious you’ve been holding onto those thoughts for a while, so no, Lando, it’s not nothing.” 
“I don’t wanna fight,” He mumbles, eyes glued to his fiddling fingers. You seem to notice his sudden quietness because your expression softens as you cross the room to sit next to him. 
“We’re not fighting. You’ve got something on your mind, and I want to know so I can help,” You reply, shifting to face him. He can tell how you're trying to keep your voice as level as possible. “Please let me help.” 
Lando chews on his bottom lip, unsure. You say you want to help, but he's worried that if he tells you what's really going on, you’ll think it's silly. It is silly, really, him feeling insecure because of how smart you are. But if he doesn't tell you, you’ll think he doesn't trust you, and he does trust you. He trusts you with everything. 
Then you say his name again, softer this time, and you’re looking at him like you’ve done something horrible, and he sighs. 
“Sometimes I feel like I’m not smart enough to be your boyfriend. You get all excited about your research when you talk about it,” He sighs, shrugging clumsily, “and I want to understand it because I wanna be able to get excited about it with you, but I just don’t get it. And it makes me feel stupid.” 
“I didn’t—Lando, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know. I didn’t mean to, I—” 
He shakes his head forcefully, grabbing both your hands in his. “No, that’s not what I meant. You never make me feel stupid. It’s my problem, really. I just…I’m not really known for my brains, yeah? Came to terms with that a while ago.” 
“You’re smart, Lan,” You insist, brows pinching in the middle. “You’re so smart, what’re you even talking about?” 
“We talking about the same person here? I never even finished school. Wasn’t too good at it before I left either.”
“There’s more than one way to be smart, y’know,” You continue. Lando tilts his head curiously, not unlike a puppy would. “You’ve got amazing people skills, you’re creative beyond anything I could’ve dreamed up, you’re well balanced with your emotions. Not to mention the amount of skill and strength it takes to do what you do everyday, at the level you perform at.” 
“No, but that’s different. I could never do what you do, remember all the stuff that you’ve had to.”
“And you think I could do what you do?” You ask, giving a disbelieving chuckle. “Genuinely, if I got put into the cockpit of your car, I wouldn’t even be able to start the bloody thing, let alone drive it the way you can when you’re being bombarded with information from all sides during a race. If you put me in front of a group of reporters, if I had to do even a fraction of the press appearances and sponsorship events you do, I’d probably shit my pants.”
Lando wrinkles his nose in slight disgust. “That’s nasty.” 
“It’s true though! I can’t do half the things you can, but that doesn’t make me any less smart. It just means we’re smart in different ways. So what you never finished school? School isn’t the only way to measure how intelligent you are. And Lando, you’re beyond intelligent.” 
His shoulders sag with the long sigh he releases, and he lists to the side, slumping over onto your lap. “Sorry for lashing out,” He murmurs, cheek pressed against your knee. He rolls over onto his back, gazing up at you with truly apologetic eyes. “I didn’t mean what I said, I was just being a dick.” 
You hum noncommittally, stroking a hand through his curls. “You’re allowed to have feelings, Lando, it’s alright.” 
“Yeah, but what I said was just mean, and I didn’t—I wasn’t thinking straight. You don’t deserve to be snapped at like that.” 
“Makes up for all the times I’ve snapped at you during exams, so…call it even?” You ask, leaning over him with a soft smile. 
“We’re even.” He lifts his head, craning to reach your lips, and you chuckle a little bit, but meet him halfway in a gentle kiss. 
It’s an I’m sorry kiss, a I forgive you kiss, a I’ll always support you kiss.
A no matter what you say, I’ll love you forever kiss.
This fact, Lando knows for sure, even though a little bit of him still thinks he’s not quite as smart as you.
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msmk11 · 5 months ago
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Hiii!! I love your work so much and was wondering if you could do a poly marauders (and lily) x hufflepuff coded fem reader comfort fic 💛 maybe they are just having a bad day, being insecure and everyone tries there best to comfort her? thankyou (even if you decide not to)
Omg hi lovely! Thank you so much for the request. This is actually my first ever and I’m so excited and happy to write it for you! I hope it lives up to your standards - MK <3
Just Hold Me For Awhile
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Poly!Marauders + Lily x fem!reader
Word count: 1.3k
Cw: low self-esteem, hurt/comfort, sad/anxious reader
A/n: Baby’s first request! Ngl I rewrote this like three times, but now it finally feels genuine and I’m very happy with it. I hope you all enjoy :)
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There is no evidence to confirm your fears besides the incessant voice inside your head.
You’re not good enough.
You’re not smart enough.
You’re not funny enough.
You’re not pretty enough.
Eventually, they’re all going to leave you.
You are going to end up alone.
Deep down, you know none of these things are true. But reason is no match for your anxiety and the extraordinariness of each of your partners.
James- best Gryffindor chaser the team has had
in years.
Lily- number one in your class.
Remus- Casanova of Gryffindor tower.
Sirius- absolutely fearless in the face of adversity.
You- the ordinary Hufflepuff who just got lucky.
It consistently amazes you that you ended up in a relationship with these four bold, well-known, and well-liked Gryffindors. They all love you so much and you feel grateful that you get to love and be loved by them everyday.
But no matter how much love and care they give you, it cannot entirely soothe the deep-rooted feeling of inadequacy lurking within. You can’t help but sometimes feel out of place in your own relationship- not because your partners exclude you, but rather because your obvious ordinariness situates you outside their circular of extraordinariness.
It’s a feeling that’s lingered since the four first showed interest in you, but recently it’s been possessing you tenfold.
All these thoughts are racing around in your head as you sit at the foot of Sirius’ bed in the boys’ dormitory. Peter is off on a date, leaving you five with some much needed alone time. The moment is serene, with Sirius painting your nails a soft green, Lily braiding Sirius’ hair out of his face, Remus dangling over the edge talking to you three, and James on top of him, massaging his back.
The four are talking about some recent Hogwarts drama, so you’ve sort of zoned out of the conversation, only adding in commentary here or there.
“I mean, I’m so glad Pandora hexed him,” Lily says, “he totally deserved it.”
“I just never would’ve pinned her as the type of person to hex someone, with the way she’s so soft spoken and all,” Sirius replies.
“She does hang out with your brother and Junior though,” Remus reminds him.
“And Evan is her brother,” James adds with a laugh, “it’s in her blood. I just wish I could’ve seen Mulciber’s face.”
“It probably looked as dumb and stupid as always, if not more so,” Sirius jokes.
Everyone busts out laughing and you faintly chuckle through your anxiety-induced brain fog.
Someone taps the side of your cheek.
“Doll, you there?”
You jolt out of your trance and look at Sirius, “hmm? Sorry, what?”
“I asked if you wanted anything else done to your nails.”
You briefly glance down at your perfectly manicured nails, “oh, uh, yeah. Perfect as always, my star.”
Remus reaches down and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, “are you okay, dove? I feel like you’ve been awfully quiet today.”
You smile a little and wave him off, “oh yeah, fine. Just tired, Moons.”
“Wanna come take a nap, angel?” James asks sweetly, opening his arms.
Though you’re not actually that tired, it’s mainly just an excuse, you can’t pass up the offer from your cuddliest of boyfriends. You peck Sirius’ cheek as a thank you for doing your nails and then crawl onto James’ lap. You situate your head on his chest and curl up as he wraps his arms around you. His musky cologne eases the knots in your stomach a little and you try to focus on the steady beat of his heart.
“Better?” he mumbles into your hair.
You quietly hum in confirmation.
You keep your eyes closed all cuddled up with James as you listen to your partners quietly chat. Within minutes of your getting settled you sense movement on the bed. Remus shifts upwards to lay next to you and James- you can tell from the sudden increase in body heat- and you feel Sirius and Lily lay down at your feet.
Suddenly, you feel a pair of rough lips- Remus’ lips- against your forehead. Though he thinks you’re asleep, you hear him whisper, “get some rest, my sweet girl.”
Someone’s head falls on your knee and then you hear Lily’s voice, “she’s so pretty when she sleeps, isn’t she? All soft and peaceful.”
You recognize Sirius’ habitual stroking of your leg with his thumb as he adds, “I didn’t think she could get any softer or sweeter, but here we are.”
“Our angel,” James coos.
Though you suppose most would feel pretty lucky to hear these things about themselves, they only make you feel worse.
You hate yourself.
You hate yourself for having four wonderful, caring, and loving partners, and you can’t even appreciate them because of your own self-loathing. You despise this nasty habit of self-sabotage, but you’re not sure how to break it.
As you lay there and listen to them say such nice things about you, you feel a lump grow in your throat and hot tears spring to your eyes. The tightness in your chest is near painful, and you need some relief.
You try to shift just the slightest- as if you’re just moving around in your sleep- to bury your head in James’ chest, out of everyone’s eyesight.
But once you let one tear drop, a whole rainstorm comes. You try and keep your sobs and sniffling quiet, but your hot, wet tears give you away to James.
“Angel?” James asks worriedly. He pulls you away from his chest to look at your face and sees the snotty, tear-stained mess you’ve become.
“Dove,” Remus pleads worriedly, “what’s wrong? What’s happened.”
Your sobs are too strong for you to respond and you can only shrug your shoulders. Your eyes are blinded by tears and you can’t see their faces, but you know they’re filled with concern and worry. To make them worry like this only causes you to cry harder.
You’re not really aware of what’s happening around you. All you know is one minute your in James’ arms, and the next in Sirius’. Sirius strokes your hair away from your face and holds you in his lap like a baby. He rocks you back and forth quietly, not saying anything at all.
It’s nice, not having to say anything and just crying. Even if you had the ability to speak through your tears, you don’t know that you could. There’s no easy way to describe your feelings of inadequacy, and no amount of ‘talking it out’ could ever just solve the problem either. So you just cry. Cry because you’re angry that you feel this way. Cry because you’re sad. Cry because you’re tired. Tired of not feeling like you’re ever enough. And you cry just because you can. Because you know that your partners will be there for you for as long as you need to cry.
And when the sobs finally quiet to a hiccup here or there, you appreciate that they give you silence to breathe and just process everything.
Lily stands and wanders off, coming back with a glass of water that she presses into your hands. You sip it gently before James takes it from you and sets it on the nightstand. Remus goes and grabs a hot washcloth, wiping your face oh so gently with a soft look in his brown eyes. Sirius hands you back to James- your most tactile partner- and settles again at your feet.
Then, with the most quiet and tender voice, Sirius asks you only one thing, “What do you need from us?”
“Just hold me for awhile.”
And so, like many days before, and hopefully every day after, you five pile into bed, reveling in each other’s warmth and security.
As you lay surrounded by your lovers, you know that even though those same lousy feelings continue to reside inside of you, you will figure it out. And when you’re ready to talk, or rant, or cry some more, your partners will be there.
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in-my-feels-probably · 1 year ago
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slytherin boys or mattheo riddle as a dad please?
Slytherin Boys as Dads
Request: slytherin boys or mattheo riddle as a dad please?
Hi! So sorry for the wait, this one took me a while for some reason. I was kinda vague with these, but hopefully you like them. Thank you for the request :)
(Warnings: mentions of bad home lives, insecurity, let me know if i missed anything)
Theodore Nott:
deathly afraid of being anything like his own family or father. he’d be a little apprehensive about having kids in the first place, but he’d eventually be more open to the idea once you promised to be there every step of the way and take things slow. 
the proudest dad ever. the type of dad to clap and cheer once they use the bathroom on their own for the first time. he literally wouldn’t care (within reason) how good they’re doing at a sport or in school, he’s just proud that they’re putting in effort.
he’s got a short temper. i think he’d get a little snappy, and then immediately regret it once the tears started or they got angry and snapped back. he’d put on a brave face in the moment, but he’d for sure cry about it later to you.
he has such a way with words, and he’s so imaginative. they’d ask him kid shit that makes no sense, and he’s just deadpan answering them without hesitation. and it would be like that even when the kids were grown and moving out of the house. he just knows the right thing to say.
wouldn’t want a lot of kids. he’s too easily overwhelmed, and although he’s got the love to go around, he just can’t stomach the idea of being responsible for that many lives. one or two is enough for him, and he’d love them with all of his heart.
Every milestone your little girl met had Theo in shambles. No matter how big or small, he treated every single one of them like she had cured cancer or won an Olympic gold medal. When she started growing more independent and wanting to do things on her own, it wasn’t any different.
Theo came into your room after saying goodnight to your daughter, tears welling in his eyes. 
You stumbled out of bed to approach him, holding him steady by his shoulders when he wavered. “What happened? Are you alright, love?”
“She made her own bed,” he said, letting out a shaky breath. “She didn’t want me to tuck her in. She said she wanted to try doing it on her own this time. And she did it so well.”
You could feel your heart warm, wrapping your arms around Theo’s shoulders. You gently rocked him back and forth, running your hand through his hair. He pulled back, quickly wiping under his eyes.
“Sorry,” he mumbled, a sheepish smile on his face. “She’s just so smart.”
“Don’t be sorry, love. Just wait till she gets to Hogwarts. She’ll be top of her class, just like her Dad was.”
Your words sent him spiraling again, his cheeks paling. You chuckled, bringing your hand up to hook a finger under his chin, turning him to look at you. You spoke gently, giving him a warm smile.
“But that’s not for a long time. We’ve still got years with her before she does something substantial for us to fawn over her for. Let’s not worry about it yet.”
Theo groaned, shaking his head. “I’m always worried.”
You smiled, wrapping your arms around his middle. You rested your cheek against his chest, listening to the faint thump of his heart.
“Did you ever see this coming for us?” He mumbled, resting his cheek on the top of your head. “Back at Hogwarts, I can remember wanting a life with you. But this isn’t what I was picturing. I used to not even want kids—Merlin, how could I have not wanted kids?”
You shrugged, closing your eyes and breathing him in. “I always knew you would be a good Dad. I pictured some sort of family with you.”
Before Theo could respond, your little girl came around the corner into your room, immediately running for Theo’s leg. She wrapped herself around him, playfully hanging from his pant leg.
“What are you doing out of bed, silly girl?” You asked, bending down to scoop her up.
“I have a question,” she babbled, absentmindedly reaching her hand up to squeeze your nose.
You laughed, passing her over to Theo. “Ask your Dad. I’m sure he’s got an answer.”
She wrapped her arm around Theo’s neck, tiredly rubbing her eyes. Theo looked down at her adoringly, patiently waiting for her to ask her question. 
“Why can’t I see my eyes? I can see your eyes and Mum’s eyes, but not mine. Why?”
You had to stifle a giggle, turning your face so your little girl wouldn’t see you laughing. But when you looked back up, Theo was just smiling down at her, like it was the most normal thing she had said to him all day. 
“I’ll tell you, and then it’s off to bed with you, darling,” he explained, brushing his thumb across her cheek. “You see with your eyes—through your eyes. That’s why you can’t normally see them themselves. But technically, you can see your eyes. Do you want me to show you, pretty girl?”
She looked up at him with wide eyes, nodding excitedly. Theo grinned, chuckling as he looked over at you. He nodded towards the bathroom where the mirror was, shifting your little girl on his hip. 
“I’ll be right back,” he said to you, before whisking your daughter off to the bathroom.
They giggled together all the way down the hall.
Lorenzo Berkshire:
the sweetest most dedicated man in the early stages. he would NEVER let you do more work than him. you’re not climbing up high, you’re not lifting something heavy, you’re not doing anything that keeps you on your feet. he’s BOLTING to beat you to it.
would give no fucks about gender. i think he’d absolutely adore having a little girl, but a boy is just as good. because he’d get to raise him up into a man the both of you are proud of.
gets overwhelmed easily for sure. would absolutely stress about not doing enough or upsetting the kids, and you’d have to remind him that he’s an incredible dad, and how he’s only human. making mistakes is gonna happen, there’s nothing you can do but keep going and try your best.
100% going all out for any sport/extracurricular they get involved in. he’s their number one fan.
probably the gentler parent. he’d try his best to be stern with them, but he just doesn’t have it in him to upset them. tears would literally break his heart, so you’d probably have to take on the more serious role.
You had two kids with Enzo, a girl and a boy. They adored their father—as they should. He was sweet and loving and hardly ever said no. But that was the problem…he hardly ever said no. 
And it got the best of him today.
The kids came bursting through the door, running into the kitchen with Enzo hot on their heels. He was carrying bags from the new toy store in Diagon Alley, a distressed look on his face as your children ran up to you to show you their new toys. You gave them a tight smile, faking enthusiasm.
“Very cool! How about we help Dad take them to your rooms, yeah? You need to eat before you play with them.”
“No,” your little boy whined, trying to dig in the bags Enzo was struggling to carry. “I wanna play now!”
Enzo let out a sigh, his voice strained. “Listen to your Mother—”
“We wanna play!” Your little girl screamed, her little cheeks flushing.
She turned around to root through the bags with her brother, when one ripped and the toys clambered to the floor. They scattered, and Enzo finally reached his limit. 
“That’s it!” He shouted, hoisting the bags up to set them on the countertop where they couldn’t reach. “That’s enough. You’re going to eat your dinner, and you’re never allowed to yell at your Mother again! Do you both hear me?”
Your kids stopped in their tracks, looking up at him with wide eyes. He might as well have slapped them—that was how they were looking up at him. Like he had hurt them worse than he ever had before. They were being dramatic, of course. You had scolded them far worse than that in their lives. But Enzo was never one to yell. He hardly ever raised the voice around the kids, it hurt him too much to do it. You looked up from their faces to Enzo’s.
And the look on his face was heartbreaking.
“I’m sorry,” Enzo stuttered out, unable to say anything else.
You could tell he felt terrible. His eyes were glazed over, and his hands were shaking at his side. You quickly scooped the toys off the floor, shoving them back into their bags. You bent down to speak to your children, grabbing each of their hands.
“Alright…everyone breathe. You two, I’m going to take you to your rooms. I expect you to be ready for dinner in ten minutes. And if you behave—and you apologize to your Dad and I for not listening to what we asked you to do—we’ll let you open up a few toys and play with them later. Your Dad was very nice to get you all of these things, and you both need to act like it.”
Your little ones looked up at the both of you, batting their eyes. You could feel your anger slip away as they watched you, their little cute faces scrunching up. 
It wasn’t fair—they were too adorable to be mad at.
“We’re sorry, Mum,” your little girl said.
Your boy nodded. “Yeah, we’re sorry Dad. We didn’t mean to yell.”
“I know, my loves,” you smiled, squeezing their hands. “Neither did Dad. It’s alright…everyone is just a little tired. Thank you for saying you’re sorry. Keep that attitude up, and your Dad and I will be happy to play with you after dinner.”
Your children giggled and ran off to their rooms with bright smiles on their faces, like nothing had happened at all. 
Your husband, however, was steel reeling. As soon as they were out of the room, you turned to him. His face was full of regret, his eyes sad. You frowned, opening your arms.
“Come here, sweet boy,” you murmured, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. “You did so good. You’re okay.”
“I didn’t mean to yell,” he choked out into your shoulder, holding you tight.
You just shook your head, shushing him. “You had every right to. I love them to death, but they can be brats—and they know their Dad loves them too much to tell them no. You saw them, Enzo. They’ve already gotten over it. Don’t beat yourself up over this, love.”
Enzo sniffled into your shoulder. You held him tighter, gently rocking him back and forth as he leaned into you. It was quiet while you looked over his shoulder to the bags still on the counter, toys spilling out of the top of them.
You chuckled, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. “You’re such a good Dad. They’re gonna be glued to you for weeks after they open all of those.”
“I’m sorry you had to take the lead. I should be better at this by now. I just can’t handle it when they look at me like that.”
You heard a clattering, and looked over to see your kids in the next room, politely sitting at the table. They were giggling to themselves, on their best exaggerated behavior so that they could earn back time with their toys. It was adorable, and it brought a smile to your face. You looked up to see Enzo smiling as well, despite his anxiousness.
“How do they look now?” You asked, reaching for his hand. “Because to me, it looks like they’re on their best behavior so they can play with their lovely toys that their even lovelier Dad got for them. It looks to me like they want to play with their Dad so bad, that they endured—Merlin forbid—washing their hands and setting the table just to do it.”
Enzo chuckled, squeezing your hand. “It does look like that, doesn’t it? Well, let’s not keep them waiting, darling. We have bags full of toys and two lovely children waiting for us.”
Mattheo Riddle:
girl dad girl dad girl dad
absolutely gonna have a meltdown raising little girls because it means he’s gotta start kicking some little shit’s ass for hurting one of his daughters. you’d seriously have to hold him back once they start showing interest in dating, because he’s not ready for them to be that grown up.
absolutely an affectionate parent. hugs and kisses before bed, he didn’t make the rules he just enforces them. he’d want his kids to feel like there was never a point in their life where they were too old for a cuddle.
deathly afraid of fucking them up. he’d rely on you in the early stages to help him along, but he’d really get the hang of it fast. later on in their lives he’d wonder what he was even so worried about.
would absolutely adore you after you give him kids. he would never whine about being stuck with diaper duty or homework because you already did so much giving him his girls. it’s only fair that he takes care of them—including you.
During Christmas break, your girls came home giggling. It took you days to get them to finally tell you what was going on, and you made them swear not to tell their Dad what happened. They had both met someone they liked over the term and had asked you to help them owl them.
“As a woman, I’m thrilled,” you explained, speaking in a hushed whisper in the kitchen. “And I want to hear all about it. But as your Mother, I’m begging you not to tell your Dad. Do you remember what First Year was like and you two came home talking about all the cute boys at school?”
Your eldest groaned in her chair, looking at her sister. “We’re silent till summer, got it?”
“Got it.”
You woke up the next morning to shouting coming from the kitchen. You rushed out of bed to find your two eldest sitting at the table, their heads in their hands. Mattheo was standing across from them, your youngest in his arms innocently looking up at him.
Your eldest looked up once you walked in. “Help. I’m begging you.”
“Mattheo,” you scolded, giving him a stern look. “They’re our girls—they’re smart, and they’re ready for this. You should be happy they came to one of us first.”
“But they’re my little girls,” he whined, shutting his mouth when your eldest piped in. 
“We’re not little, Dad. Not anymore.”
You watched his face fall, his chest tightening. You gently took your youngest from his arms, passing her to her sisters. You motioned to the living room, nodding your head. 
“Go sit down for a bit, girls. We’ll be right out, yeah?”
They nodded, filing out together. You could hear them whispering as they sat on the couch, giggling. You turned back to Mattheo, gently guiding him backwards until he fell into a seat. He looked up at you with a pout, heaving out a sigh. 
You smiled down at him, brushing your thumb across his cheek. “Do you remember when we met at Hogwarts? We were so lucky that I was smart enough for the both of us. Who knows what kind of trouble we could have gotten into if I let you lead.”
“We got into enough trouble,” he murmured, his tone sour.
You rolled your eyes, reaching down to grip his hands. You leaned forward, your knees knocking with his. 
“Listen to me. Our girls are smart—they’ve got their Mother’s intuition, thank Merlin for that. And one day, they’re gonna grow up. But that’s a far day from today. They’re not getting married, love. It’s just a crush. They want to send an owl.”
You squeezed his hands, nodding for him to turn his head to look out into the living room. He turned to see your girls all sitting on the couch together, the youngest in the eldest’s lap. Your older girls were making faces and sounds, trying to get the little one to laugh. She was looking up at her sisters with wide eyes and a bright smile, breathy chuckles pulled from her chest. You smiled, turning back to Mattheo. 
You hooked your finger under his jaw, turning him back to face you. “They’re still your little girls, Matty…they’ll always be your little girls. But we have to help them grow into women. And they need their Dad to help them do that.”
Mattheo sighed, leaning forward to rest his forehead against your stomach. You threaded your fingers through his hair, holding him close to you.
“You’re my best girl, you know that?” He murmured into your stomach.
A warm feeling spread through your chest as you smiled. Your daughters interrupted you before you could speak, the middle one shielding hers and the youngest’s eyes. 
“Ew! Stop being gross, Dad!”
Mattheo chuckled, leaning back to look up at you. He glanced over at his daughters, absentmindedly reaching for one of your hands. He interlaced your fingers together, letting out a—this time, content—sigh.
“You’re right. It is going to be a far day.”
Regulus Black:
i feel like regulus would be a very chill parent.
i don’t think he particularly likes children, but he would love his own. he’d adore them when they were all little and cute.
he definitely would be really good at disciplining them. he never has to raise his voice or get physical, he just gives them a look and calmly explains to them what he expects, and they’re content to listen to him. it’s so different than how he was raised, and he would promise you that he’d do better with them than his parents did with him.
he’d be really afraid of hurting them like his parents did. you’d have to assure him every time he felt like he was doing a bad job with them.
when they’re older, they’re totally momma’s boys and girls. when they’re children they couldn’t get enough of him, but as they get older they’d start leaning towards you. he wouldn’t even mind the favoritism, because you’re his favorite too, of course his kids would be smart like their dad.
You and Regulus had a little boy and a little girl together, the boy a few years older than the girl. Sometimes your little boy would play a little rough with her, not understanding that he was too big to be getting that excited with her. 
You’d catch them in the yard, him chasing her around while she dawdled and squealed. You watched through the window, calling Regulus over to come watch. Regulus smiled as he came from your bedroom, rubbing sleep from his eyes as he peered out the window. But your little girl tripped after a while, and your boy was quick to tumble after her, laughing as he fell. He was still giggling when he sat back up, but she sat up with tears streaming down her face.
You quickly rushed out the back door, panic settling in your chest. “What did I tell you about playing rough with your sister? She’s too little, darling!”
You tried your best to remain calm, but you just couldn’t do it. Regulus, however, was as calm as ever. He followed you out the door, walking over to scoop up your daughter. He sat down in the grass with her, cradling her in his lap.
“What happened, sweetheart?” He asked her, gently shushing her. “You’re alright, it’s okay. Just breathe.”
While you were too busy calming yourself down, you failed to pick up on the shock on your little boy’s face. He was wide eyed, taking rapid breaths. Once your girl was calm, Regulus held his arm out for your boy.
“It’s alright. Everyone is fine. We just have to be careful, yeah? Can you remember that?”
Your boy nodded, and Regulus gave him a grateful smile, pulling him in for a hug. You watched in awe, finally pulling yourself together. You took a breath, sitting down in the grass next to your kids. Your little girl was quick to switch to your lap, wrapping her arms around your waist. You hugged her tight to you, smoothing your hand over her hair.
“I’m sorry for snapping at you,” you said, reaching your free hand for your boy’s. “You just scared me. I know you didn’t mean it.”
Regulus nodded, giving you a smile before grinning down at his kids. “Lots of excitement this morning, huh? Barely nine in the morning and we’ve already given your poor mum a heart attack. I vote we spend the rest of the morning inside, yeah?”
Your kids nodded, standing up and running inside like nothing had happened. Regulus stood after, offering his hands to you before pulling you up and into his chest. You pressed your cheek into him as you hugged him, letting out a breath.
“You’re a good dad.”
Regulus smiled to himself, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “You’re a good mum, darling. The best.”
A/N - Hi! Hope you liked these! Thank you again for the request, I really enjoyed writing this :)
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loviingpedri · 6 months ago
Text
hidden commitment - pablo gavi
prompt: what would happen if your relationship was exposed?
warnings: cursing, grammar issues, stalking (paparazzi), mentions of insecurities, angst (happy ending, ofc!)
credits to owners for all images
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
you and gavi have been a secret for 6 months. it felt like peaceful without anyone getting into your personal business. every moment with him became more special.
“should we take a walk?” gavi finally had an off day. he wouldn’t want to spend it anywhere or with anyone except with you.
“of course. favorite place as usual?” replying with his smile, he kissed you on the lips and went off to get ready. matching hoodies and matching sunglasses never seemed to fail.
it was very therapeutic to take morning strolls. nobody can spot you in the dark, and it was rare that anyone was even awake. an opportunity to catch up in life should never be missed.
"you look good." gavi approached behind you, sneaking his arm around your waist.
"i was thinking the same thing about you. we do have quite the taste." taking a quick kiss to his lips, it was time for the adventure to begin.
walking out the door, the cold crisp breeze hit your face instantly. the air felt fresh and clean. holding hands with your beloved, the wind picked up, intensifying gavi's scent.
an intensifying, yet subtle mix of a sweet apple that gives relief after a sunny day. his eyes reflecting a sign of almonds and honey as they were filled with love for you. his eye color reminding you of deep, dark, yet candied honey. the inside of an almond representing his pale, creamy skin. you only noticed the special details of him that nobody else could.
talking about the most random things possibly. cracking random jokes that changed the topics within minutes. becoming nostalgic of old memories that summarized how the past few 6 months were able to happen.
toning out the sound of crickets and birds, excusing the rustling in the bushes as an animal. lost in your own laugher, neither you or gavi could hear the camera shutter. pictures being taken as you were wrapped in gavi's warm embrace, synching heart beats. images spreading online as quick as the way gavi spun you in the middle of the street. the night disappearing and fading away just as your smiles after discovering the pictures were all over social media.
gavi was inflamed. you were confused. you just wanted one peaceful night. maybe even even more. it wasn't ideal to go public so early. none of you had a full conversation on this. it would put too much stress. worse part was, nobody was mentally prepared for this.
the media went crazy when it was posted. articles after articles with the pictures were all over it. different angles, different interactions, it really exposed both of you.
"gavi, what do we do?" an overwhelming sense of panic and anxiety came upon you.
"i don't know, okay? this is just as fucking complicated as it is for me," he held his head with his hands as he sat on the edge of the bed. mumbling spanish curse words under his breath. "shitty paparazzi always has to do something."
you rose from the bed. "we need some space right now. contact your publicist, immediately." grabbing your phone and leaving the room, gavi needed time to process things correctly. he was better doing it in silence, as his anger would get the best of him.
opening the guest bedroom door, the emptiness instantly coming into contact with you. the only background noise is the air condition on the highest setting possible.
sitting in the empty room for a few minutes, your phone began to blow up with notifications. follow requests from instagram and tiktok were taking over your screen. how the fuck did they find you?
suddenly, texts from your best friends were pouring in. sending countless articles about your relationship. you took a deep breath. opening each article with your eyebrows becoming furrowed. lies, upon lies were written. the false information that was feeding the media made you rethink of your decisions of this relationship.
next were tiktok videos being sent. opening the comments, your insecurities consumed every inch of you.
'she bagged gavi? she's not pretty enough for that.'
'look at her in those clothes. gavi shouldn't be with someone that weighed that much.'
'did she get lip fillers? she needs a refund from whoever did them.'
'even if she was a gold digger, she should be buying better clothes than that.'
'there's no way she is a gold digger, that money could've been used to do plastic surgery.'
without realizing it, tears were flowing down your cheeks. you put your hand over your mouth to cover up your sobs. you were hurting inside, but you couldn't stop scrolling through the comments. soon, you heard gavi yelling in anger into his phone. your head was pounding. too many thoughts, emotions, and problems were piling.
your heart beat increasing rapidly. your vulnerabilities crashing like waves in your mind. the hurtful comments struck your skin as thunder. the saltiness of your tears streaming. your heavy breathing to stop your anxiety. you were crumbling into sand.
hearing the bedroom door open, you wiped your tears quickly. gavi walked through the door ready to speak, but stopped in his movements. he could see the redness in your eyes of sadness.
"have you been crying, my love?" he sat next to you on the mattress, slowly reaching his arms out. feeling his warm embrace, something wasn't right.
"we need to talk." both of you said at the same time.
"you should probably go first." you told him in a whisper.
"no, it's okay. you're going through a rough time."
"i know you just got off the phone with your publicist. what's the next step we should take?" he cleared his throat. he looked scared to speak. opening his mouth, a lump formed.
"it's better if we take a break."
silence.
he imagined you being hurt. your pupils told him otherwise. you were thinking the same thing.
"i understand. i think that's best for the both of us." he nodded as he stood up. indicating he was going to pack his stuff, he seemed more hurt than he did. him and his publicist discussed other options if the first one didn't work out. he imagined you fighting for your relationship, but you were seriously going to let it go like that. gathering his belongings, he realized that he didn't know how much to pack. his head was in denial of emotions. he packed up and left without any formal of goodbye.
——————————————
two days had passed after the unfortunate events. gavi had ensured he would have full security around the house to protect you. it was then you realized that it was sunday. meaning you had to go grocery shopping or else you would starve for the week.
changing into a little red top that revealed some skin, pairing with a leather jacket and leather pants. the realization hit you that you needed to cover your face. one person recognizing you could end in you becoming surrounded in a crowd full of questions. taking a red scarf given to you by gavi, you wrapped it around you, making sure to cover the lower part of your face.
meeting up with a security guard at the market, it was like a normal grocery shopping spree. until, you accidentally bumped into someone. this caused your face to be exposed.
"holy shit, you're y/n!" you gave the person a quick smile before rushing into another aisle. word must have gone around fast. you were circled with a crowd of people. some having cameras ready. the scarf was long gone from your face.
"y/n! is it true you're dating pablo gavi?" smiling was the only answer you could give them. smiling was another way of apologizing by running them over with the cart.
cameras continued to shutter and the flash nearly blinding you. "who is this man right here? is he your boyfriend? are you cheating on gavi?" you tried to hide your facial expression, but that was one of the dumbest questions you've ever heard.
apologizing to the cashier for the commotion, you grabbed your things and left. driving around multiple circles due to cars following you. you nearly fell to the floor after the experience.
"need some help with the bags?" you jumped in fear. getting a closer look to the couch, of course pablo gavi was sitting there.
"holy shit. you nearly gave me a heart attack." passing the bags towards him, he shared his gummy smile.
"you should really change the locks." putting the cereal away, you looked at him confused.
"how come?"
"it was that easy for me to enter."
"gavi, you had the key. we're on a break. besides, why are you here?" putting the last thing in the fridge, you poured yourself a glass of water. looking into his honey eyes as he sat down across the kitchen island.
"i wanted to apologize for putting you into this mess. i'm sure we can get through it though. it would be better to do it together, not really alone."
"are you asking to get back together?" you hid your smile behind your cup, taking another sip.
"yeah, i guess you could say that. we could go out for dinner tonight."
"can't believe the famous gavi is asking me out." he winked at you.
there was no more hiding. love was meant to be expressed. you couldn't escape the paparazzi, but it was no secret that you were happy. pictures of you holding hands at a restaurant really sealed that the world can mind their own business.
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deesseshesca · 2 months ago
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PAC : How can you appreciate your body ?
I want to give you a hug ...
Good evening pretty soul ! I am so excited ... IS OFFICIALLY KINKTOBER ! DAY : 13-14
You want to have a sneak peak into my readings (for 2.22$), you can join my Chérie d'Amour (soul tribe)
SEX Doula =SALE READING
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PILE 1
To appreciate your body more, begin by recognizing that the discomfort or doubts you're feeling are temporary. You’re not stuck, and by embracing the natural changes that come with life, you can start to see yourself with fresh eyes.
Use your inner wisdom to see through the insecurities that cloud your view. You’re sharp, perceptive, and capable of cutting through negative thoughts. Just as you respect your mind, show the same respect to your body. It deserves appreciation for its strength and uniqueness.
The habits or thoughts that have held you back are loosening their grip. This is your chance to free yourself from those old patterns, to accept your body in a way that liberates you. When you let go of that baggage, you’ll create space for something new—a healthy and loving connection with yourself.
Someone is about to enter your life, and this new relationship will reflect the love and acceptance you’re starting to cultivate within yourself. By embracing your body, you're preparing yourself for the affection and admiration that are headed your way.
💌 : Dear Chérie d'Amour, if you wanna to UNLOCK your sexual potential you can always join ''CHÉRIE D'AMOUR'' for only 2.22$/month you have access to audio pac, extended writing pac, collective pac. A place where we can build our little community. This week pac is : How can you give yourself self love in a sexual setting ?
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PILE 2
To truly appreciate your body, start by giving yourself the kindness and care you deserve. You’ve likely been giving so much of yourself, but it's important to receive that love, too. This means recognizing your worth and treating yourself with the same generosity you give to others.
Right now, you’re holding on to past trauma, and it’s keeping you stuck. The trust issues you carry are impacting your relationship, but they come from old wounds, not from what’s happening in the present. Accusing your partner of things without proof isn’t helping; it’s only creating distance. You’ve been through a lot, and it's understandable that trust is hard for you, but by holding on to those fears, you're adding weight to the relationship that isn’t necessary.
You’re nurturing and strong, but it's important to nurture yourself, too. Give yourself permission to release the need for control or suspicion. When you stop letting your fears guide you, you’ll notice how much lighter things become. Your partner has shown you that they’re not doing the things you're afraid of, but until you trust yourself and the love in your relationship, these fears will keep resurfacing.
It’s time to slow down, reflect, and understand that your partner isn’t your past. The more you focus on healing and trusting, the more your relationship will thrive. By appreciating your body, you'll start to ground yourself in the present, letting go of those old habits that are no longer serving you. This will give both you and your partner the space to grow and love each other in a healthier way.
💌 : Dear Chérie d'Amour, if you wanna to UNLOCK your sexual potential you can always join ''CHÉRIE D'AMOUR'' for only 2.22$/month you have access to audio pac, extended writing pac, collective pac. A place where we can build our little community. This week pac is : How can you give yourself self love in a sexual setting ?
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PILE 3
Okay, here’s the deal: to appreciate your body more, you need to stop thinking you're stuck in a cycle of feeling bad about it. That feeling? It’s temporary. Your body is always changing, and so can your thoughts about it.
You’re smart, and you know better than to keep being hard on yourself. It’s time to see your body the way you see your mind—strong and worth respecting. Don’t let your own negative thoughts drag you down.
Those old habits that made you doubt yourself? They're starting to fade. You're ready to let go of them and embrace your body for the amazing thing it is.
Once you do that, things will start falling into place. The universe has good things in store for you, but you need to clear out the doubts first. And guess what? There’s someone great coming into your life soon. By loving and accepting your body now, you’re making space for all the good things waiting for you.
💌 : Dear Chérie d'Amour, if you wanna to UNLOCK your sexual potential you can always join ''CHÉRIE D'AMOUR'' for only 2.22$/month you have access to audio pac, extended writing pac, collective pac. A place where we can build our little community. This week pac is : How can you give yourself self love in a sexual setting ?
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scftpcws · 11 months ago
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Oliver Quick x Fem!Reader
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Warning: 18+ MDNI, jealous!Ollie, choking, my terrible grammar 😚
——————————— 💌 ————————————
now we all know that oliver is an obsessive lover. that much is clear. he wants to be with you hell he needs it. it feels like part of him is missing when you’re gone. he can’t stop himself from touching you the minute you walk through his dorm room door. the second you enter the threshold his hands are on you, fingers stroking your cheeks, lips on yours. he just cannot get enough.
if he could crawl inside your ribcage and live by your heart forever he’d do it in a heartbeat. having his thick cock burried deep inside you is the next best thing to him. fucking you raw and deep is intimate in way nothing else is. there’s just something so raw and personal about him being the only person who gets to see you splayed out on his bed, your hands tangled in his hair, your soft eyes looking into the icy blue of his own, all while his cock lays embedded within you.
much like felix, he doesn’t like to share what’s his. he won’t. he likes having you all to himself. and he likes being yours. this causes him to get a little (a lot) jealous when he sees you with other guys. if michael looks at you too long he makes sure to protectively place his hand on your thigh, squeezing ever so gently to let his ‘friend’ know that you’re off limits. does oliver see michael as competition? of course not! but he does know how badly michael wanted to be where he is now, his cock in your tight pussy, ravaging you like it was his birthright. of course he knew that’s how michael felt, because thats how he felt during those first few weeks of university after seeing you for the first time. he felt like a horny high schooler with a crush way out of his league (in his opinion). when you said his named for the first time he could have came in his jeans then and there, you were just so beautiful. so, so beautiful. now you were all his.
i wouldn’t put it past him to fuck the ever-loving shit out of you when you get back to the dorms. it’s not that he doesn’t trust you, god he trusts you with his life. he doesn’t trust everyone else. maybe he’s a little insecure but all that goes out the window when he’s driving himself into you, his hand grasping your throat- not hard enough to bruise but firm enough to get the message across- he cock so hard and thick that it feels like he may break you.
he moves his hand up to your cheek lightly tapping to get your attention watching the way your glassy eyes focus on him and only him. good.
“who do you belong to, hmm?” he asks, his thrusts never faltering, his cock so deep inside you, you were sure you could feel it in your stomach. “you” it was barely above a whisper, tears of pure ecstasy flowing down your soft cheeks. he needed to hear it, he needed to feel it. he ceases his thrusts immediately, smiling devilishly at the whine that escapes your kiss bitten lips. “who do you belong to, sweetheart? don’t make me ask again.” his hand is back round your throat, a tighter grip this time. you can barely breathe but it brings you so close to the edge. “You! Oliver. Im yours all yours.” it comes out almost like a prayer, an act of pure devotion and love. it was true. you didn’t want or need anyone else when you had such a beautiful man to wreck you and put you back together again every time. he gives you a smile of satisfaction, it’s almost condescending, but by god does it stir your stomach.
“there’s my good girl.”
taglist 💌: @sydneyyymayyy
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cozymoko · 5 months ago
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Ohh!!! Can i have fruitykawa with a reader who's kind of insecure about their relationship with him? Like,yes she's aware that they are married and all,but Fruity is such a wealthy (and handsome) man that surely there are alot of women around him. It makes her feel upset and tries to distance herself from him.
🌕 anon
ALWAYS, MY BELOVED
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It's been a while since I updated. Shoutout to my homie, 🟡 anon for this request. Kinda got burnt out at the end, but I tried my best. Enjoy~!
Pairing: Hachiro Furukawa x Female! Reader (1.9k words)
Format: Headcanons, mini scenarios
WARNING(S): yandere themes, jealousy, insecurity, mentions of cutting (plastic surgery).
Synopsis: Hachiro Furukawa, my oc, with a wife who's insecure due to him being so handsome! (≧∇≦)/
REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED!
NAVIGATION 🍮
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Being WEDDED to the BEST is not for the weak-spirited. You had to appear stronger — better than the average woman so that they wouldn't dare question the legitimacy of your place. With your status, a ring costing nothing less than a fortune would never be enough. 
Your marriage had become public only a few years ago. Due to Hachiro's wishes. Yet that didn't seem to stop many promiscuous women from testing their luck. You bit back the unladylike words bubbling in your throat as they approached him. Fluttering their long lashes and flashing their pearly white teeth.
Models, lawyers, entrepreneurs: the party was bustling with so many. For a moment, you felt like nothing more than a pretty little accessory.
“Mr. Furukawa, how nice of you to make an appearance!” The host's eyes shift to you, thick and clouded with disdain. “It's a joy you brought the misses with you this evening.” The snarkiness of his tone was palpable. It seems the host wasn't exactly a fan of you, but then again, who was? After all, no one bothered to hide their curious gazes when Furukawa was not within earshot. But all you could do was hold your husband's arm just a little tighter.
The women especially.
"Is that Furukawa? Isn't he just dashing!"
"Wah~! He's even taller than I imagined!"
"Do you think he'll drink with me?"
Tightly sewn dresses, embracing the ladies that adorned them. Various warm shades painted lightly across their lips. Bouncy twists and swirls curled into their hair. Bedroom eyes peering over the many men scattered across the room; married or not. It's safe to say you weren't exactly pleased that your husband was one of the few.
You often hid yourself behind layers of lovely fabrics and excellent posture, in hopes of maintaining your modesty. In your eyes, it only seemed right that you matched the appearance and aura of that of your Husband. Though it seems each and every day was a torturous test of your self-restraint.
Nonetheless, you were never one to lose your composure. A straight face was essential in any type of business setting. Sure, you weren't as deadpan as Furukawa, but you could definitely play the "cold wife" role perfectly.
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RECENTLY, you've had QUITE THE OBSESSION with FASHION. You have encountered plenty of upcoming entrepreneurs, many of who you've managed to befriend. One of your closest ones is a fashion designer.
She would soon be introducing her new line of work after months of a troublesome hiatus. So, after pulling a little bit if strings, you were able to help her out. By strings, you mean asking Hachiro for some assistance. With his support of the project, people were bound to come and see the clothes. Granted, he was skeptical of your request, it didn't take him long to break and give you what you want.
That evening, the two of you attended an induction ceremony for the company's new clothing line. Hachiro had no reason to attend, but the grin on your face was much too difficult to resist. Just knowing that he made you happy warms his heart immensely. You were the cutest.
But, all good things, of course, come to an end.
“Oh, my! Look who decided to grace us with his presence.” A woman with rosy lips approached the two of you, swaying her hips a bit too much for your liking. “Hachiro, dear, it's been so long since I've seen you!”
Even other women didn't dare to acknowledge you, especially in the company of Hachiro himself. He didn't take kindly to people dismissing your presence. But this girl, definitely had some guts.
“Inoue,” he hums languidly, watching her in masked disdain. “I'd rather you not address me so informally in such a public setting.”
That's right, KAMIKO INOUE, one of the top models that had recently taken Japan by storm. You were expecting her appearance after Hachiro's announced sponsorship, but her rudeness surprised you a bit. Especially her addressing your husband as though they were closer than friends.
You scoff, looking away from the two. Seeing how you'd much rather watch them set up than listen to Inoue's mindless flirting. Hachiro placed his hand on the small of your back, rubbing gentle circles into your skin. But you couldn't dare look into his tender gaze, knowing of the possessiveness bursting within your chest.
She giggled, “How silly of you, Hachiro!” She reached her manicured hand out to grab his free arm just for him to grab her by the wrist.
“Please refrain from touching me so familiarly, Inoue. I'm a married man, and I'd be simply overjoyed if you would respect that.” He gave her a smile that didn't quite reach his steely eyes, before pulling you flush against his chest.
A bright red bloomed across your skin at his affection. Hachiro never showed too much PDA. "You have a photo shoot to attend to, no?" He asks coldly. "Me and my wife will be sure to cheer you on from the sidelines.
That soiled your mood for the evening. Snatching the genuine smile from your lips and replacing it with one faker than the plastic on that whore's skin. For once in your life you were truly feeling vulnerable.
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YOU had CONTEMPLATED GOING UNDER the KNIFE more times than YOU CARE to ADMIT. Not for your own pleasure, but the sake of your sanity. You didn't know what you'd do if you saw another beautiful woman talk to your husband.
Even in your youth, he was the center of attention. He had captured the hearts of many girls from various levels of wealth. You would know as you were one of them. But you were in no way richer or as elegant as the others who approached him. So why did he choose you? You asked yourself.
That night you had taken the guest room. It felt cold and quiet. Absent of the usual scratching of pens and occasional shuffling of papers you had grown accustomed to. The pleasant rumble of his chest as he attempts to entertain you whilst working. But you couldn't bring yourself to lay by his side with such heinous thoughts roaming your mind. You were able to fall into a long, dreamless slumber. But not without the company of a few heavy tears and a single question.
Were you selfish?
From that day, you didn't bother answering his calls, whether it be morning or dawn. You didn't bother visiting him during those long hours he slaved away at the company, though many times you truly wanted to. You didn't bother to allow your personal driver to pick you up, and if he tried, you merely snuck out of the house.
Any and everything reminded you of him, and that alone rendered you to tears. While he was away, you didn't allow yourself to be another burden pestering him on his business trip. You couldn't allow it.
AND IT WAS ALL DRIVING HIM CRAZY.
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THE FLIGHT HOME was DREADFULLY SILENT. Aside from the tapping of someone's sleek dress shoes. Hachiro had not so much as uttered a word since boarding the plane, nor did he intend on it. For if he did, nothing kind would leave his mouth. Perhaps a, "hurry up," or two — or three. But all of it was for the sake of his sanity.
Hachiro needed his wife, desperately.
You slip through the large double doors, entering your bedroom with wary steps. It was quiet, as expected, and without your presence, it felt almost dead. A week had passed since you last drowned in the warm duvet. A week had passed since you relished in his scent nestled deep within its silk. And oh how you missed the smell of him. Finally, at peace, your shoulders dropped. You took a seat on the edge of your bed. Under your confident front, you were only one person. One person with one mind; though you usually had two. Hachiro and your own. But your pride didn't allow you to confine in the man you loved. What were you scared of? Being shamed, or perhaps laughed at — scolded? Though none of it seemed likely, you could not shake the feeling of embarrassment that held you on a tight leash. CREAK! You jumped, startled by the sudden weight pressed against your back. "Thank God you're safe," your heart swelled at the sound of his voice. The voice of not a stranger, but a lover — a partner. Hachiro grabs you by the chin and lifts your face up. You quickly recoil away in shame, praying he didn't get a peek at your messy face. The need to prove yourself had increased tenfold, you couldn't allow yourself to falter in his presence. “look at me, [Name]," he whispered softy. Hachiro lifts your head once more, swiping away the tears rolling down your cheeks. "You're crying? Tell me what's troubling you. I can help you, [Name]."
And just like that, you broke. Loud, anguished sobs tore through your throat. Your stomach fluttered at the familiar smell of citrus and mint. You couldn't get enough of it. His arms were warm and comforting, and you couldn't deny the safety you felt by his side. His embrace was stronger than anything you've ever known, as if holding him wasn't enough, you held him as though he were your lifeline. It wasn't your intention to tell him, but you just couldn't help it. Each and every thought was placed on the table. The insecurities that you felt bestowed before him. The people you despised and envied slipped past your lips without thinking. All while Hachiro cooed sweet nothings in your ear, promising you his loyalty until his last breath. “God, you're so beautiful,” he whispered, running his thumb through the swollen flesh of your eyes. His usually cold eyes burned with something you couldn't possibly describe. “I can hardly control myself sometimes.” You stared at him dumbfounded — in utter disbelief. His glasses must've been dirty, you thought. Your hair was a literal wreck. And the past couple of weeks had not been too kind to your skin. Small breakouts peppering your cheeks from stress; bags that could carry at least a ton of sorrow nestled beneath your eyes. Surely his vision was just a little blurry. But upon further inspection, you couldn't spot not a spec of dirt on his lenses. Upon your lack of response, he hums, leaning in a bit closer. “I'm serious, dear.” You huff, burying your face into his neck as your skin takes on a feverish shade of red. Damn him for being so attractive. You felt like a high schooler all over again. Smiling softly, you held him closer. “You're the best, Hachi.”
Hachiro sat awake by your side, gently stroking your back with easy motions. His lips had found themselves on your warm skin. And his heart beating vastly at the things you had confessed to him. The possessiveness you had experienced for him. The jealousy and anguish that had consumed you on his behalf.
Of course, he never wanted to see you upset, but seeing how you value him makes him a bit selfish. Just seeing you made him snap a little on the inside. His rational mind fought for control over his need to have you, to prove his love to you. But he decided against it. He would be sure to show you how deeply his love runs on a later occasion. But for now, he settled for cradling you in his arms. Promising to take all those bitter emotions away from you.
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“Good morning, Japan!” Shouted the host. “It's come to our attention that Ms. heartthrob Kamiko Inoue has quit the modeling industry after a life-threatening accident!”
“...HUH!?”
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©CozyMoko, all rights reserved. Don't repost my work on other platforms.
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animehideout · 1 year ago
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Hii! Its my first time requesting something like this but...
I think that it would really be a good idea tho
Insecure Reader x Jjk Men Finding Out
Soo.. Lets say(for the concept) Reader has really been insecure about their body because of childhood trauma.. Thinking that no one would love them or give time to love them they tried to "sewerslide" but.. they fail and after some convincing from there family reader feels a bit better about there body not completely but its better..
Fast Forward A Few Years Later
Reader meets (jjk men) and both of there relationship goes very well (jjk men) were very touchy and clingy to reader... One day (jjk men) convince reader they should go clothe shopping.. while there at the store(can be any store).(jjk men) finds a dress .. they asked reader if they would like to try it.. reader at first says no thinking its way to revealing and memories come back from the past.. but still agreed she went to the changing room and went out to look for (jjk men)/ there bf but they dont find them?.. she searchs and finds there bf with a girl the girl is touchy.. and clingy to there bf/(jjk men) reader sees this and immediately thinks of the worst i mean the girl looked drop dead gorgeous.. there bf (jjk men) notices reader and goes to them ignoring the girl.. they then realized something not right.. reader isn't as clingy or Happy like she was earlier (There bf being there lover notices this and ask) "Reader/N/N.. are you feeling.." but stops mid way sentence they realize that reader keeps adjust the dress and squeezes parts of her body..
(Its up to you if its SFW or NSFW and if you want to Shorten it)
Insecure Reader X JJK Men Finding Out.
check out part 2 here
a/n: Thank you anon for submitting your request. I hope you like it, if you want part 2, or if your fav characters aren't mentioned here please let me know I'll make part 2.
Warnings: Mention of Suic*de / Negative feelings / Negative body image / Depression/ Slight smut.
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Nanami Kento:
It's like Nanami was sent from above to heal all of your traumas. Your relationship was smooth he treated you with pure love and care. You already told him about some of your insecurities but didn't go deep into details, leaving your attempts to unalive yourself unspoken of, and hidden within you. To celebrate one of your close friend's bday, he took you out shopping to pick a dress for you.
“Try this one love, I'll wait here for you” .
You took the dress and rushed to the changing cabinet, for the first time you felt beautiful in something revealing, but that soon collapsed to the ground when you found him talking with a drop dead gorgeous lady, with a beautiful body and soft facial features. You observed how both of them spoke, how she was blinking slowly as she extended her hand to touch his forearm. It's like your world stopped. Nanami was the one who helped you temporarily forget about the shit you dealt with in the past but now the same man triggered it again, crashing the efforts you put in order to heal.
Visions of your dark times started showing it's like they were in full display, making you swallow hard, remembering how you used to stand in front if your mirror scolding yourself, attacking your innocent reflection with hate words as if you were your own enemy. You looked down checking your body, regretting that you agreed to go shopping in the first place.
“Excuse me” said Nanami to the woman the moment he noticed you. “Sweetheart, the dress suits you perfectly” he complimented you with a soft smile.
You hummed in return, your eyes still fixated on your own body, awkwardly trying to fix your dress with trembling hands.
“hm? everything is fine?” he asked with a frown.
“y-yeah totally” you lied.
But he picked up to you, noticing that you were feeling down and something changed your mood to the worst.
“Wanna go somewhere less crowded?” he suggested knowing that prolly need some alone time, out of sight.
You nodded slowly, putting back your outfit of the day, exiting the shop. You sat in a empty park, the whole time you were silent, too overwhelmed to find the right words that could express what you've felt. He observed you, giving you some time to compose yourself but he couldn't wait too long so he took the initiative and said,
“I understand how you feel, I-”,
but you cut him off, and he was faced with a side he never thought you had.
“NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS FEELING, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW YOU WAKE UP EVERYDAY AND FIGHT THE URGE TO KILL YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU CAN'T ACCEPT YOURSELF” you yelled as tears started streaming down your cheeks.
His eyes widened, taken aback by what you blurted out. “killing yourself?” these words lingered in his mind, he thought that your insecurity was something normal that anyone experiences but not to the point to make you hate your own existence. Before he could say anything you stood up and started walking away, but he stopped you grabbing your waist,
“you'te not going anywhere love, we need to talk”.
You struggled to break free but he trapped you between his arms making you sit back down on the bench with him.
“Tell me everything, I don't want you to carry any weight alone, I want to share it with you”.
You spent the whole evening venting, expressing yourself.. The more you talked about your attempts the more he held you close, scared of the thought of losing you. Once you finished talking, he spoke with his honey-like voice,
“I'm sorry you had to face all of that, you are beautiful, you are worth it, you are amazing the way you are! But we, humans tend to be harsh on ourselves, we tend to physically hurt ourselves to take our mind off of what we're feeling. But I don't want you to do that again, I don't want you to lose yourself to self hatred. I'm here to unburden you, to take your pain away, that's what lovers do.. I love you so fucking much and I'll always choose you, cuz my mind, body and soul crave you alone”
It's like you've been waiting to hear these words for ages, despite the comfort of your family and friends you've always took it as a flattery but Nanami succeeded in making you try to give yourself a chance to love yourself again.
“And about that woman, she was just trying to make me buy more dresses.. all what I want is you”
He made your heart flutter, he made you feel that it's okay to not be okay. He indeed took that weight that was burdening you for years. He promised to help you in the process of making you feel better again to completely heal.
“Nanami what if someone sees us” you chuckled when he started kissing your jaw,
“I don't care, I just want to show you how much I love you” he said between kisses as his strong arms tightened around you, pulling you to sit on his lap, making out till the sun went down.
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Gojo Satoru:
It left you speechless when Gojo Satoru, the strongest sorcerer who could pull anyone he wanted, asked you to be his partner. Who would say no to Satoru, so you agreed despite the growing feeling inside you that you don't deserve him.
For the first couple of months everything went good, a lot of flirting, a lot of touching, but deep down you couldn't brush away the idea that he was dating you because of a bet, you were too insecure to believe that he actually had a real interest in you. You succeeded in hiding the dark thoughts that crept inside you, scared that sharing such stuff would make him see you as weak and non deserving of his time, so you kept it all to yourself.
But he proved you wrong when he confessed that his feelings towards you grew; he loves you, also you shared your first kiss together. He's a confident man, both in his looks and personality, and the fact that you're his partner boosted your confidence, making you try to put aside all of your past traumas.
Both of you were attending a very important party, so him being a good, rich boyfriend took you out to go shopping and spend his money on his one and only; you. You were too anxious to do so, cuz you knew he'll end up forcing you to try clothes on for him and make you swirl around. But you tried to stay calm and put on a smile on your face. He was extremely happy and hyped so you didn't want to ruin it for him.
“This is the one” he said his blue eyes glistening with excitement.
You would hesitantly grab the dress.
“Come on baby, try it on, let me see you”.
You rushed to the changing room mentally preparing yourself for any possible criticism. You tentatively walked out trying to adjust your dress, but no sight of Gojo. You frowned in confusion as you started looking for your boyfriend, only to find him talking to one of the boutique staff. Your eyes widened and you felt a sting in your chest. The fact that he didn't turn his infinity on and casually let her touch him made your self esteem drop instantly. Your mind became hazy with negative thoughts, making you doubt yourself and doubt his love for you. You felt completely overshadowed by her. She was so damn gorgeous and with Gojo being handsome, the thought of her being a better match for him took over your mind. It's like one of your nightmares came to life.
You cleared your throat, trying to get Gojo's attention, you were planning to tell him that you were tired and wanna go home, just so you can be alone with your thoughts. The moment Gojo looked at you, he quickly ran your way, completely ignoring the girl even though she was still talking.
“Damn you look hot, babes” he exclaimed scanning each inch of you.
You hummed looking everywhere but his eyes trying to avoid his gaze.
“I think this one suits you wel-..huh? baby?”
He was so quick to catch up with your mood swing. Immediately noticing the change in your energy and vibe.
“ just tired, can we go home?”
“Baby what's wrong you were all happy and excited, did I do anything wro-”
but he stopped mid way when he saw your hands restlessly adjusting the dress, and couldn't stop tugging on the cloth, clearly uncomfortable.
“I just wanna go home Satoru”,
you stuttered as you quickly rushed back to the changing room leaving him awkwardly standing there like a statue. You put your clothes on and left the shop, you could feel your panic attack building up and hell no you weren't ready to let anyone witness your break down in public, especially your boyfriend.
“WAIT BABE!”,
he quickly paid for the dress; he genuinely liked how it suited you, and he rushed outside catching up on you. He grabbed your arm and turned you around.
“Oh my..”,
he said when he noticed your glassy teary eyes. You sniffled and mumbled a little,“Im fine”
“No you're not! talk to me please.. you know you can trust me right?”
You swallowed hard, realizing maybe it's the time to let it out and make him face the real you, it was choking you so bad.
“I think we should break up Satoru” you started.
His heart started racing, his hands shaking.. “no..what did I do? I'll make it up for you I promi-”
“Its not your fault Satoru, it's mine. I'm not healed yet and I don't wanna burden you”
“heal from what? you're scaring me! tell me evey single thing, I wanna listen to you”,
he said seriously, taking your hands in his gently kissing it. You took a deep breath, he deserves an explanation.
“seeing you with that girl, it- it made me uncomfortable, you didn't even try to stop her when she touched you, I mean I know she's way prettier than me and you deserve someone who's on the same level as yo-..”
“Hey hey wait, where did all of this come from?” he would ask in utter shock. “First of all, she took me by surprise when she touched me, because I never activate my infinity when I'm around you or out on a date with date. Second of all, she's not prettier than you and no one is.”
You shook your head, refusing to buy into his words even though he was genuinely telling the truth. He would grab your face and force you to look up at him.
“Where did all of this come from?” he would ask again.
He finally succeeded in breaking through your exterior and learned about your past trauma and how you attempted multiple times to end it all. He would carefully listen to you speaking your heart out. His heart shattering into pieces, imagining how you dealt with that all alone and worse that's he's the one who stirred them back today.
“I understand if you don't wanna be with me anymore, I've always thought that you deserve much better than settling dor me”
He didn't say anything, instead his lips crushed on yours. Taking you by surprise. Pouring all of his love for you into that kiss, hia lips moving passionately and in sync with yours..
“My world is nothing without you, even in ultrnate universes I'll choose you over and over again”
He spent the rest of the day holding you close to his chest while cuddling in your shared bedroom. Literally doing everything to cheer you up again. Would constantly blame himself, apologizing on repeat
“I'm sorry, I wish I met you years ago, but I'm here now and I'll make sure you never feel that way ever again”
You'll end up comforting him instead, while he buries his face in the crook of your neck.
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Toji Fushiguro:
Toji is an extremely handsome man with a ripped body, any human walking on this earth would be attracted to him from the first glimpse and that was the case for you. You tried to stop yourself from loving him, thinking that he wouldn't even notice your existence and might make fun of you for thinking that you stood a chance to be with him. But you were left dumbfounded when he confessed that he wants you. You couldn't help your feelings and felt weak in front of him so you accepted his feelings, and started dating. But doubt and self consciousness always had to kick in especially when both of you are in public and women can't keep their eyes off of him totally ignoring that you're standing next to him.
You stood there in the middle of the changing room tightly tugging on the dress that Toji picked out for you. You didn't feel yourself in it, it was too revealing for your liking. As if everything you were trying to hide for the past years is now exposed.
With caution you stepped out, you had to show Tojo after all. But to your surprise you found him talking with a girl, who had her hand on his chest, but he stepped back the moment she touched him; he's always been so loyal to you. But you couldn't help the heart break, and now memories from your past started overflowing your mind, making you feel so small in that dress, so ashamed for even trying it on. A lump formed in your throat, as you felt the room narrowing around you, leaving you completely suffocated.
When he caught you standing there while staring at him, he figured out that something was off. He always sensed your discomfort in public especially when someone tries to hit on him, he thought it was only jealousy where in fact it was way bigger and complicated than that, it was a past trauma that been haunting you. He walked towards you with a smile, circling his strong arms around your figure as he started praising you, trying to calm down what he thought ' jealousy '
“Damn you look stunning”.
But his words fell on a deaf ear, all what your mind thought about is how you used to isolate yourself and torture yourself with your negative self assumptions. He noticed how sadness was drawn on your face and how your hands couldn't stay still, continuously touching your body and dress.
“Are you okay? what's the matter?”
“Nah nothing Toji,”,you said voice cracking giving you out.
“Is it because of that girl? you know I've got eyes only on you right?”
“No it's not the case” you simply answered “Can we just go home now?”.
He nodded paid for the dress then both of you went home. You thought you'd isolate yourself in your room like what you used to do, break down in pieces alone while you feed on your dark thoughts for long hours. But this time Toji didn't allow it, your silence was hiding something knotted and he had to crack it. So he started bombarding you with questions,
“What's wrong?” “Come on tell me!”,
but the more you ignored his questions afraid of opening up the more you made him furious, and it quickly escalated into a heated argument. It's like rubbing salt on a freshly wound.
“why do you keep on fucking pushing me away? I'm so done with this kind of behavior”.
You couldn't take it anymore, so you blurted out all of your accumulated emotions, all the pain that had been smothering you for years.
“BECAUSE U DON'T DESERVE TO BE WITH YOU TOJI, I DON'T DESERVE ONE BIT OF YOUR LOVE.. look at you and look at me! you're just wasting your time with someone who is insecure and too broken to be fixed”.
He froze in place, it's like getting stabbed in the heart with the sharpest blade. It broke him to hear you confess this to him. He's always seen you as the most beautiful person that he ever laid eyes on, and was left stunned when he knew that you think the complete opposite of yourself.
“For how long have you been feeling this way?” he would ask taking a step closer to you, his strong features softening.
“Years..” .
“I just hope you can see yourself through my eyes..”,
without any further words, he would carry you to your bedroom, completely strip you of your clothes. You were too drained to stop him so you just let him do his thing. He climbed on top of you while taking off his clothes as well.
“My words might not convince you, but my actions will”.
He would make love to you for the whole night, making sure to kiss and caress all of your insecurities. Sensually whispering that's you're more than perfect for him,
“You're everything to me.. I live to worship your body..”
He would be so gentle making you feel good, making you feel loved and desired. Taking your mind off of your past issues. Proving to you that you are beautiful in your own way, boosting your self esteem.
“I love you, for you. Don't let these thoughts ruin us, I'll make sure to delete these insecurities forever.. you'll only be filled with me and my love for you”
.....
✨ 💌 I just wanted to say that it's okay to feel insecure or sad.. Feelings whether if they're positive or negative are what make us humans. But always remember that every person is beautiful in their own way.. you don't have to wait for anyone's approvement of you, be who you are, we only live once so let's make the best out of it, let's work on ourselves to satisfy ourselves and not others. You are perfect just because it is you!! You have your own sparks that no one else have, you're unique and special. Let's all of us do our best to be happy and to fully live our lives embracing the ups and downs. Wishing all of you a blessed life 💌✨
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divinesangel · 8 months ago
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— 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐢𝐬 𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮?
pm me for an affordable, in-depth personal reading!
— 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐚 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞!
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— 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟏
this person envies you for being very attractive + attracting many people. i see that this person feels quite bad about the situation you are going through right now, and it seems that part of their envy has to do with how you attract others, even without intending to do so consciously. this person feels that you have always had many opportunities that they have not had and they feel as if they are in a situation of no return, as if they have hit rock bottom and do not know how to come back outward. they see you as someone who has always had many opportunities and who has always been able to do what they wanted because of it, something that this person has not been able to do in their life or has not felt that they have been able to. in addition to that, i feel that this person is capable of seeing that there are other people very interested in you, very interested in how you handle yourself, in how you are, and who are interested in being with you, and that is something that makes them feel quite insecure. i feel they have been able to realize that there are people who look at you a lot, and in particular, i see that there is a person who has realized that there is another person who is quite interested in you, and they have ended up feeling quite bad about it. perhaps this person has had feelings for this other person, and that's why they feel this way, but they can see that there is something about you that attracts others and makes them like you, and it makes them feel very victimized or like they are victims of the circumstances surrounding them. they see you as a very independent person, someone who could have anyone they wanted, and that makes them feel insecure because they feel they are not that type of person, and even if they tried, they could not achieve it. your energies are completely different, as is the way you express yourselves to others. they are also able to see that you are a very sensitive person and someone whom people treat very well. and there is something here about you having more opportunities than them, which is what mainly makes them feel quite bad. and for many of you, i do not think they are job opportunities or material opportunities, but opportunities in terms of love or friendships. they feel that you are superior to them, and they are not comfortable with that.
— 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟐
in this case, i see a feminine energy that doesn't seem to harbor much animosity toward you. i feel that in the past, this person may have been attracted to you and may have thought that you could be good friends or just get along well, but that changed and took a downturn. i see that this has to do with a guy who may have been involved with you or with her. if you haven't had anyone or haven't been in a relationship recently, it could be that this person was interested in someone and that person didn't pay much attention to her, but did to you. i definitely think it's someone you know, but apart from that, i see that this person has changed quite a bit in terms of their feelings toward you, and i feel that in the past you got along well or at least this person had good intentions toward you, and that changed completely and turned into something not very pleasant. i feel that this has to do with some relationship since i keep seeing that guy i mentioned earlier. i feel that your name was mentioned in a conversation within her circle, and that changed her opinion of you. besides that, i feel that part of her envy has to do with seeing you as a very charismatic person who also gives a lot to others, meaning you're always there for others and are very compassionate with everyone, and that's something that repels them. in this person's mind, they feel that life hasn't treated them very fairly, and they feel very conflicted about it. they feel like they're still finding their place in the world and need that intimate connection with someone. something they haven't been able to have and they think you do with the people you know. this person feels hurt by something that happened between you and another person and it's eating away at them.
— 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟑
there's someone in your circle who envies you because of all the things you've achieved so far. it seems to be related to work, maybe from your professional sphere, or perhaps someone you study with. undoubtedly, it's someone you know. and this person might be experiencing feelings of dissatisfaction or jealousy because of your success and abilities, which could lead them to act somewhat unfairly or confrontationally towards you. furthermore, i feel like this person might be driven by competition or the desire to surpass you in some way. they feel somewhat inferior to you and feel like they should be in your position. they feel like they have to prove themselves all the time in order to get to your level and feel sort of like enough, not even for other people, but for themselves. i feel like this is someone that you hold some affection for. i don't think that you guys are that close, but i do see that you may have helped this person in the past, or you just may have had some affections for them. i feel like things were good at the beginning, but for some reason they started feeling less secure with the things that they had, and they just felt like you were sort of like a rival that they have. they definitely see you as someone quite powerful, and this is not in terms of power dynamics, but more of the way that you portray yourself, and also how well you do your stuff. i feel like they're very intimidated by that, and that creates conflicts within them. they feel kind of torn apart by how they're feeling, and i feel like sometimes it hurts them that they feel this competitive towards you, but it's not something that they can avoid since it stems from their own insecurities. i also feel like this is a feeling that comes and goes, so it's not like that all the time, but it's definitely kind of damaging for them.
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𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭
hi! it's daphne here.
i'm currently offering personal readings for €5 ($5.43) so don't hesitate to send me a private message if you're interested!
thank you for being here!
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cheriladycl01 · 10 months ago
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Could you do oneshot for Checo with wife pregnant!reader? She accompanied him to the race and he had a crash during Monaco GP 2023 and she's afraid that he will never get to see their child and everyone in the garage tried to calm her down. But he's fine. And she just grateful that he's still alive. I don't know if it make sense. Add something you'd like though. Tag me later!! Thanks!!
Monaco: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly - Sergio Perez x PregnantWife! Reader
Plot: Sergio Perez gets into a nasty crash in Monaco, where his wife attends to support despite being uncomfortably pregnant. However, with the rainy weather conditions Monaco GP is looking more dangerous than ever!
A/N: this is a little shorter as I struggle to right for Sergio more than others!
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This year, you hadn’t really been to many races as you’d got pregnant during the winter break. You’d spent Christmas avoiding people asking why you weren’t drinking before letting everyone know after the first doctors appointment you had.
By the time the Monaco Grand Prix rolled around you were coming up to around 7months of your pregnancy and boy could you tell.
However, because of what Monaco was Sergio had asked you to come considering that’s where you both resided now that he was in Red Bull.
You agreed to come as long as the days weren’t too strenuous on you, and that you always had a seat available as it was hard carrying another human inside of you.
When you arrived at the garage you’d never had so many compliments from well pretty much everyone. Everyone in Alpine had congratulated you, as it was Sergios old team and there were people there that still held a lot of love for the both of you.
When you came to Red Bull Max and Kelly couldn’t help but praise your looks and how you were glowing. And it went on like that for most of the day, people complimented how you looked and it made you feel better about any insecurities you held.
The only thing making you anxious now was the race itself.
You of course loved to support Sergio in what he did but you couldn’t deny that your husband driving round tricky tracks at over 200mph scared the living daylights out of you.
And Monaco, we’ll it was one of the worst. It’s the tightest street circuit ever, and you have to be very precise when it comes to overtaking and gaining places.
Through the whole weekend it had stayed relatively nice, when it came to the weather and the vibes. Everyone was cheerful and excited about the race at one of the most iconic tracks in motorsport. After some great times tested in all the free practices and getting into Q3 in Qually, Sergio was in P8 having locked up on his flying lap.
You were currently in the garage sat watching the race with the mechanics next to you.
“It’s going to be hard for them to get ahead of both the Ferraris and the McLaren” you say to the mechanic next to you. Seeing Charles in Pole, Lando in P2 and and Carlos in P3, Max in P4 and Sergio behind 2 Mercedes, and an Aston Martin.
You watch the lights turn off once all five had lit up, and listen to Cofty commentating. You watch as Charles manages to keep the lead, Lando falling in nicely behind him while Carlos managed to defend from Max quiet nicely.
Sergio had an amazing start, meaning that he moved up past George in the Mercedes, sitting comfortably in P7. Over the radio all the drivers were let known it was going to start raining within the next 3 laps, most of the drivers pitted.
Max pit for Red Bull first while Sergio stayed out moving up to P2 with Lewis now in the lead. Ferrari having made a double Pit stop worried about their drivers with the oncoming rain.
The rain started to come down heavily, you watched on from your husbands car camera seeing how low the visibility was.
You saw his mechanics preparing to have him come in and change to intermediates. You watch on seeing him struggling for grip until he slides forward having something jolt him from behind.
His car, flips as the Aston that bumped his rear also lost grip forcing itself around his car. They are both sent into the barriers both cars getting a massive shunt.
There’s debris everywhere and his car is no-longer race worthy.
Your mind goes haywire and your hand reaches up to your mouth to cover it as it opens in shock. Tears built in your eyes as you watch no movement from both cars.
“Oh my god!” You breathe, one hand still covering your mouth the other resting on your stomach.
What if this was it? You questioned to yourself.
Would your husband never be able to meet his child? You wondered watching as the medic car is released and sent to go help Sergio and Lance.
Some of the social media girls in the garage come up to you, holding a hand out to you to grip in shock. One of them is whispering that he’ll be okay but you are only listening to Crofty and his soft commentating about the incident.
Mechanics soon come up to you realising what has happened trying to block your view and make you take a seat as they can see you are getting breathless.
Red Bull was like one big family, they’d know you since before Sergio had joined as you were good childhood friends with Kelly, so they all felt a high level of protectiveness over you.
You were the sweetest person in the Red Bull family, always bringing them health boxes, full of delicious yet healthy snacks, and then on Sundays coming by with post race goodies that they could class as part of their cheat day, and you were always willing to listen to each and every one of them.
“No no no” you cry more tears spilling as neither driver continues to communicate or make movements.
Some more of the mechanics rushed over to you, pulling you away from the cameras and the screen. Kelly follows holding your hand in a comforting manor. They sit you down in Sergio’s drivers room. The TV in there is on and playing the crash and Kelly goes to turn it off but you stop her before you can.
“No I have to know!” You say watching on as you see the red flag given, all the drivers coming into the pits.
Lance manages to pull himself out and is able to communicate back to the Aston Martin team who all cheer as he is presumed okay, where he pulled himself out and is walking.
He walks straight over to Sergio, there’s some kind of communication which makes you sigh in relief that your husband is able to talk. Nods of heads show that they’ve agreed on something and Lance helps as Sergio pulls himself up on out the car.
You sigh in relief seeing that he was able to get himself out the bashed up car wreck. He wobbled around before collapsing to the ground which only had your heart rate spiking even more.
Lance called the medics over, pointing for Sergio to be helped into the van first. A stretcher was brought out from the back. More tears falls from your eyes, however your husband knew what you’d be looking like right now.
And frankly he’d never liked seeing you cry.
So he pulled himself up, and walked towards the medical van despite what the Marshalls were telling him.
He explained to them he wanted to show his wife and team he was doing okay. Lance clambers in the back after him and they are driven round the last bit of the track to where he would be taken to medical tent for evaluation.
A knock on your door sounds and in walks Christian Horner himself. You smile lightly at him but the tears only come out a little more as he looks between you and the TV.
“He’s going to be okay Y/N” he promises and you nod.
The wait for him to come back and be cleared by the medics was painful, you waited for so long it felt like hours but in reality it was only 30 minutes. There was no damage in the crash, only a mild concussion that would be okay within a few days of rest.
“Hello mi Carina” he smiled sheepishly at you.
“You had me so worried!” You cry as you pull him into a hug, he hugs you kissing all over your face before bending down to the height of your round belly.
“Im so sorry, to the both of you! I can’t imagine the stress I just put you both through!” He offers kissing your clothed stomach and rubbing it lovingly.
“I was so so scared that you’d never get to…” you stutter and choke on your words finding it hard to admit what was so worrying to you, what you’d feared for a long time now.
“Id never leave you both” he smiles standing back up to his full height and pulling you into a chaste kiss that you melt into.
“I love you so much” you sigh sinking into his hold strong hold .
“I love you too, I’ll never put you through what I did today again!” He promises holding into you tightly.
He wouldn’t admit it, but today really was a change of perspective of racing for him.
He’d never been that apprehensive getting into a car and driving it as quickly as he did, but he knew he would have a new found patience and carefulness driving the car after todays events as he too had been fearful he wouldn’t make it back to his two best girls.
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nocturnalpl4gue · 6 months ago
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༊ ⊹ ˚. Yan!Enki and Ragnvaldr x reader 🕸️
CW: Obsessive behaviour, guilt tripping (Enki being Enki), depiction of violent urges, being tied up, bloodplay, biting, borderline cannibalism as a love metaphor, friends to one-sided enemies, slightly suggestive.
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Enki never thought of himself as the affectionate type, never has and never will, but when it comes to you, oh that smile of yours, those bruised limbs from the dungeon struggles, that strong will you could consider contagious; he yearned for it all, for it to belong to him.
Those thoughts keep buzzing around in his head whilst he reads and reads on the dirty library within the main hall, while you were right next to him, looking at his irritated expression with shaky pupils and an unsteady breath. He couldn’t focus with you like this, or him filled with so many thoughts by that matter.
“i can’t focus with you staring at me like that” Enki scowls. “you know, you should appreciate that i brought you here with me, and sharing my knowledge with you in the first place”. Those words make you feel like you’re pouring salt on a wound, but Enki has no ill intentions whatsoever, at least in his point of view.
You decide you look down in and stay silent, but your action is interrupted by a lanky hand grabbing your face by the cheeks, making you look up at the priest’s hollow eyes. “tch. can’t believe one can be so ungrateful” again with the foul words. He has always been the mysterious type, but this behaviour towards you was new. He has drawn sigils nearby every exit to prevent you from leaving, and still he won’t say a word unless it is to complain. He grabs your face tighter and frowns, mumbling to himself. “Why is it that you….”
What you don’t understand is he’s doing this out of pure fear. Not fear of losing, or death, or violence or whatever one could be thinking about, but fear of the feeling that creeps up to his head every time he glances at you. He wants to hold you, to grab you so tight he invades the cavities of your body and rips your heart out, to treasure it like a gem. He wants to kiss you until your skin wears out, and to know your every emotion. Love, he thinks, is something he wasn’t meant to feel. And so he doesn’t know how to behave, lost in a maze made from his own insecurities.
He sighs, trying to remember what those cheesy romance novels he read as a kid told. Enki, still with your face in his hand, plants his dry lips against yours, lapping them with an awkward lick. He looks at your shocked expression. “You don’t seem disgusted.” He mutters. “I assume that is one of the reasons why i put up with your whining.” He continues, acting all tough and indifferent as if his heart wasn’t jumping out of his chest. That kiss, if you could call it one, made everything click in his head. He needs you to be by his side at all times, to channel his insanity and transfuse it into passion. All he wanted right now from the overwhelming emotions that engulfed him, was to tear your skin apart, to pulverise your bones and carry you around like his personal doll. You’re his; the Gods predetermined you two meeting in the hellhole this dungeon is, to save each other, and stay together forever.
“You’re awfully quiet today. I hope you stay like this and follow my orders while we’re in here, or i’ll break your legs and drag you around.” He had this threatening aura around him as these words spewed out his mouth. But it wasn’t with an ill intent, no? He loved you after all, he thinks so at least.
All this was for your own good, he convinces himself; you need him to stay alive, otherwise you’d be mutilated on the floor for the guards to take pleasure with already. So of course you love him, you have to. And he loves you too, for the rest of eternity.
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Even an outlander such as Ragnvaldr has felt love once, but he has also felt sorrow, rage and pain. Those former emotions that haunted him still haunt him now, and are very present in his actions. Alas here he was, covered in blood from head to toe. It’s hard to see which is the enemy’s and which is his own.
The dungeon remains radio silent for the first time in possibly decades, or even centuries. The guards were no more, and so were the lizardmen, yellow mages, cave dwellers, a man who seemed to become a God, and the list goes on. He killed them all. His revenge has been fulfilled, so what now? It was only you and him traversing the passageways and bloody pits that kept him entertained.
Ah, that’s right. You. You’re a nice one to be with, aren’t you? So kind of you to stay by his side while he tainted the walls red, while his bloodlust was satiated. You were like a little lost dog always stepping on your tail, grabbing onto the outlander’s cape to encourage yourself to take another step. And he enjoys that a lot, the fact that you’re always latched to him made him feel the same about you, craving your touch and presence at all times.
So here you were, in a dark, musty room with your arms and legs tied up with your own torn clothing. The humid cold breeze hit the cuts and wounds decorating your body, making you flinch. But what makes you straight up wince is the sound of echoed steps coming closer. It was Ragnvaldr, the man who saved you countless times and you developed a bond with, who now looked at you over your shoulder.
“I’m glad you’re alright while i was out. I found some resources.” He says while crouching next to you. “Here, i got you some bread” You look at him numbly as he pulls out a piece of bread, surprisingly in a fairly good state. “Open up” He directs the piece to you mouth but it remains sealed tight, refusing whatever he gave you. You’d rather starve than accept what the man you used to trust with your life provided. He however wasn’t having it, looking at you with a light frown and pressing the fingers of his free hand against your lips. Without saying a word, he pushes until his fingers enter your warm mouth, opening it with spit coating his hand. With that, he tears a piece of the bread and puts it between your palate and jaw, forcing you to chew on it.
“See? it wasn’t that hard…you need to eat or you will die here, cold and in pain.” He says as if nothing was wrong. Ever since some time ago, could be weeks or days, you lost count at this point, the outlander has been acting out of his mind. At first you thought the insanity of the dungeon got to him, but he reassured you he was okay, that if you were there with him everything was okay. He killed the monsters in gruesome ways, tearing their tendons out with his teeth and crushing their heads with a stomp. It was like he was letting out emotions he didn’t want to go through, and now they all burst out onto an obsessive love and overprotection.
He loves you so much, he really does. So much that he starts shaking while looking at his fingers full of spit, embracing you tightly with his nails damaging your exposed back. It stung. His embrace got tighter, and tighter, much like a snake that caught its prey. He wasn’t letting go, his shaking getting heavier and laboured breathing leaving his mouth. “i love you.” he says. “i love you, i love you” He just keeps on repeating the same sentence over and over, that is until he, without a single thought in his head, bites down hard on your collarbone. You let out a hiss and try to push him off, but he’s too heavy. He just keeps gnawing and clenching his jaw around the bony appendage, so much that blood falls much like the tears around your eyes.
“It hurts….” You manage to let out. But he’s not listening. Much like a hound he has gone absolutely feral, embracing your entirety with his bulky body. His hands claw onto your spine leaving marks, and his legs are wrapped around your waist. He lets go, and switches to your neck, biting just as hard. Like he was starving he licks the blood away, no kisses and no passion put into it, just pure desperation. After protesting more and more the pain just numbs out with the rest, and you decide to relax, and stay in his arms while he devours you away. “i love you” he says, and your mind goes blank.
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acewoo · 1 year ago
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Jjk men Bf head-cannons
Note: pure fluff, Sfw Characters included: Gojo, Geto, and sukuna
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Satoru Gojo
Gojo will send you tonssss of voice messages talking about literally anything. He’ll be on his couch laying down and he’ll send you a voice message about how the show he’s watching is so boring. “The female lead doesn’t even have any personality and is just there to make the male lead look good!” You’ll complain to him sometimes that he send too many of these voice messages but, he responds that it couldn’t be true because, you love the sound of his voice. (And to be fair you do listen to every one he sends.)
Gojo cannot cook for the life of him. Anytime you try to teach him something wrong will always happen. For example you tired showing him how to make spaghetti and meatballs which is simple enough, right? Wrong. Because Gojo, not only ended up burning the pasta (somehow which still boggles your mind to this day) but, the meatballs weren’t exactly balls… They were certainly meat, and they tasted like meatballs but… they were only shaped to say the least.
Gojo definitely spoils you. And anytime you try to tell him he's doing too much he’ll come up with an excuse for why buying you a 180.00 skirt was necessary. “Well I had to get it, it was the last one and it’d work perfectly for that Christmas party we're attending!” To clarify he was talking about, the Christmas party that was three months away. Of course in all fairness you wouldn't complain too much… It would look pretty nice on you.
Suguru Geto
Even the smallest gestures he does for you are full of thought. Whenever you're having a long day at work you'll usually text Geto about your frustrations. He's trying to be supportive as you rant and help you calm down. When you get home you’ll be welcome to a newly cleaned apartment and Geto in the kitchen finishing up making your favorite meal for dinner. When he sees your home he’ll immediately start talking to you “I’ll finish up here soon, how are you feeling?” The rest of night would end up being him taking care of you fully making you forget about work entirely.
This mf definitely remembers the small things within your relationship and he’ll remember things about you no one else will. For instance you disliked when people surprised you from behind. It wasn’t anything that majorly bugged you but, it made you feel uncomfortable. (Especially since you weren’t a huge fan of being touched) When Geto found this out when we you guys were out in public or hanging with a group of friends he’d always stay slightly behind you. When you questioned why he did this, he said it was so he could make sure no one will surprise you like that. Even though you insisted he didn’t have to he still did which you couldn’t help but love him even more for.
Sukuna
He’s possessive, like really possessive. (He swears he’s not though). Anytime your in public around people or not he’ll make it clear your his. Whether that’s an arm around your waist or being very intimate with you even if it���s not the most appropriate… Whenever it’s at places such as a club it’ll be even worse, not only will be touchy but his whole mind and body will be focused on you. (Even if he doesn’t realize it..) And that’s the thing he doesn’t realize he’s like that infact anytime you bring it up to him he swears you’re just overthinking things. Because, him, Sukuna being possessive over another person? Fucking ridicules. Totally not in denial.
One thing you wouldn’t expect from Sukuna would be him to be rather supportive of you and your decisions. Of course it wasn’t exactly the most traditional way people are supportive. But hey, it’s Sukuna nothing about him is ‘normal’. Sukuna is supportive in the way where you’ll feel insecure about wearing and he’ll give you a confused look. “Why the hell would yah not wear it?” Flushed you respond. “It makes me look bad like-“ “I don’t know what you’re on about I like how it looks on you so you’re wearing it.” And of course you weren’t going to argue with your bf so, you wear it. Throughout the day He’ll make comments about how good you look which make you blush. Of course it isn’t exactly the lovely dovey kind of comments but still.
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lvndrdaaze · 8 months ago
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OMG HI MY FAVORITE TUMBLR CREATOR I have an idea >>:D WHAT IFF Your favorite Genshin Men (Diluc) come home extremely late ((2:00 am late)) and you are MAD. So- after you express how you feel (NICELY OFCCC❤️❤️) they feel so bad that they spoil you ROTTEN. Anddd if you doo— then uhh I'll sing... SWAY BY MICHAEL BUBLÉ!!!
(Honestly— Micheal Bublé reminds me so much of Diluc idk why) ALSO TYY FOR TGD WRIOTHESLEY ALPHABET!!!
——🎵🎶🎼Anon (⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)⁠♡
aaaaaaaa i'm sorry this took so long to get out (つ﹏⊂) i hope you like it!! i put my whole pussy into this one just for you <33
(also i've never thought about it but now that you mention it...yeah diluc does give michael bublé vibes ._. and now i'll never un-notice it)
Warnings: SMUT, includes use of 'pussy' and 'cunt', light hurt/comfort, crying, insecurities, oral (f!receiving), p in v, missionary, mating press, breeding kink (if you squint), biting, squirting
(fem!reader, NSFW so no minors!!)
Wc: 2.6k
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The Dawn Winery was always quiet at this time of night, though you weren't usually awake to notice it. With the maids asleep and all other business concluded for the day, the only sounds in the manor's entrance hall were the crackling of the fire and the rush of blood in your ears.
Diluc was out again, fulfilling his self-imposed duties as he did every night.
Not once had you ever complained, knowing that the Darknight Hero was something of a coping mechanism for Diluc, but tonight, something about the quiet of the manor caused all of that repressed loneliness to well up from deep within your bones, streaming out in sorrowful trickles from where it had been locked away for so long.
You sat at one end of the sofa, staring into the fire. It reminded you so much of him, not only for the obvious reason of his pyro vision, but because of the burning intensity of it. Once, he would have been beside you, red eyes crackling with that same passion that few others recognised in him, hands exploring your skin like a new world made just for him.
But now, you were alone. All you wanted was for him to come home and take up the other seat, to take his place beside you and stay for a while. There were no doubts in your mind as to his adoration for you, you saw it anytime he spent so much as a few moments by your side. It was his dedication to protecting the city that drew him away from you, forcing more and more distance between the both of you.
If only his feelings of guilt weren't so much stronger than his love for you.
When the door to the Winery suddenly swung open, you were startled out of your reverie. Shooting a glance over your shoulder to watch him enter, you read the exhaustion written in every movement he made like a story you had read a million times before. His claymore was propped against the wall and his coat hung on the rack before he noticed you sitting there.
As soon as he did, his eyebrows furrowed. Even with such a look of concern, it felt good to have his eyes on you once again.
"Love?" He called out to you, consternation tinging his low voice. "What are you still doing up?"
How could you answer that? The truth, that you had been aching for him to return and spare you even a single glance, would only weigh him down further. The worst thing you felt you could possibly be in this moment was a burden to him; that would only push him further away.
"Just couldn't sleep." You lied easily, giving him what you hoped was a convincingly relaxed smile.
However, Diluc's frown only grew deeper.
"Love…you're crying." He pointed out gently, not yet moving from his spot in front of the sturdy wooden doors.
With a swipe of your fingers across your cheek, you found that he was right. They came away wet, glistening in the warm firelight.
"Oh…" You hadn't even noticed them until now, but suddenly, your lip trembled with the emotions just barely being held back. "It's nothing, don't worry about it."
But your placating words only seemed to make him worry more. In an instant, he had crossed the room, kneeling before you and cupping your damp cheeks in his hands with a troubled look in his eyes.
"Please don't lie to me." He requested quietly. His thumbs swiped delicate lines beneath your eyes, clearing the tears that collected there.
His intense gaze was filled with such deep concern, such apparent care, it felt impossible to hide your feelings from him any longer, despite not wanting to cause him any more strain.
With a light sniffle, you dropped your gaze from his to your lap, staring down at your fidgeting fingers as they twisted around each other fretfully.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to trouble you, I just…"
Your words faltered, and tears clouded your vision once again, streaming down your cheeks in hot rivulets. Diluc stroked your skin soothingly, waiting patiently for your words.
"I miss you, Luc." Your voice was barely above a whisper. "You've been so busy recently, and I don't want to take up your time when you've got so much on your plate already, but I just feel so…lonely."
The air was still for a few seconds after your admission, until you chanced a look up at his face. His expression was stormy, clouded with irritation, causing your stomach to drop. Of course, you were demanding too much of the man who already had so many people depending on him. With a shake of your head, you pulled away from his gentle touch.
"I'm sorry, I don't want to be a burden. I'll be fi-."
"No." Diluc cut you off with a firm shake of his head, taking your hands into his with the utmost conviction. "Don't apologise. Never apologise for taking up my time."
Your lip quivered once again, the vehement tone of his voice only making your guilt feel that much stronger. Of course, Diluc would be understanding. Why had you even tried to hide your feelings in the first place?
"No matter how busy I am, you are always my priority. I apologise for failing to show you that, my love." He spoke in a low voice.
One hand released yours as he wiped the tears from your eyes again, tilting your gaze up to meet his fiercely passionate one.
"Allow me to make it up to you, love." He murmured in a voice so gentle the steady crackle of the fireplace almost drowned it out.
His gaze was heavy on your rapidly easing expression as he approached slowly and grazed his lips over yours faintly. The aching tenderness of his mouth, the smoky scent clinging to his clothes, the warmth of his body so close yet so far, everything about the moment was so overwhelming. A soft whimper escaped you as he coaxed you into a careful kiss, easing your sadness with every reassuring brush of his lips against yours.
In your desperation to prolong the feeling, your hands gripped his shirt tightly, wrinkling the fine material in your fists. With his gloved hand cradling your jaw, he tipped your head back just slightly, providing him a better angle to glide his hot tongue against your lips as he deepened the kiss.
His free hand came down to rest on your thigh, skimming over the shape of your leg beneath your dress in a way that made you tremble with barely repressed want. Diluc noticed the shiver that ran up your spine at that slightest touch, and with a low rumble from deep within his chest, his wandering hand groped more firmly at the plushness of your thighs and his tongue tangled with yours in a display of his own growing need.
Your heart was racing faster than you thought was possible, the sound of blood rushing in your ears all you could hear. No thoughts made their way past the overwhelming feelings he caused to blossom within you. Eager fingers found their way to his nape, tugging the hair tie from his hair and threading through the fiery red locks. Diluc let out a groan at the feeling, and in an instant, his arms were looping under your thighs, scooping you off the sofa easily.
"Apologies, my love, I had not realised just how long it had been." He murmured, pressing one last kiss to your lips before heading towards the stairs with you in his arms, your legs wrapped around his waist tightly.
"Allow me to make this right, yes?"
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The heat in the bedroom was sweltering, radiating from where the both of you laid together for the first time in several days. Your clothes had been long since discarded, and your shivering body was coated in a thin sheen of sweat.
Diluc laid between your legs, sweat gluing a few red strands to his forehead in a way that was almost lewd on its own from your vantage point among the luscious pillows of his bed. Strong hands pinned your quivering thighs to the bed insistently, preventing you from closing them whilst his tongue explored your folds as though it were the first time he had ever done it.
Archons knows how many orgasms he had pulled from you so far; your throat ached with every keen and whimper you let out, and dull heat throbbed in your stomach with every dip of his tongue into your wet entrance as yet another high approached steadily.
Diluc's eyes were clouded with a lustful haze as he paid attention to every reaction you made and the lower portion of his face glimmered wetly with your slick, but he showed no signs of stopping yet. Even by tugging on his loose hair, you were unable to draw his lips away from your aching cunt- in fact, the action only spurred him on, drawing deep rumbles from his chest in response to the sharp sensation in his scalp.
"Luc, please…" you whined, though you weren't certain what it was that you were pleading for. The stimulation was too much, the thought of another orgasm overwhelming, but the idea of him retracting his tongue was even worse.
"Shhh…just one more, love." He mumbled huskily, his eyes slipping shut in contentment.
His lips lowered to your entrance, lapping up the essence of your arousal whilst his nose nudged against your clit, sending electric waves up your spine. Wetness soaked the sheets beneath your hips, and the fine silk was rumpled messily from your writhing.
Wet sounds filled the room as Diluc slurped obscenely on your pussy, every action he made undignified and animalistic with his need to taste you, to feel the way your walls clamped around his tongue as though desperate to keep him there forever.
He dragged the hot muscle of his tongue against your core slowly, swirling around your clit once, twice, then fusing his lips around the bud and sucking. Your back arched and your eyes clenched shut, a clamorous wail tearing through you at the same time as your pleasure peaked, every muscle in your body spasming in euphoria as another orgasm crashed over you. The whole room seemed to fade away, until all that was left was Diluc's mouth, working you determinedly through the peak of your pleasure.
The sensation was so intense, it took several seconds for you to come down. His lips withdrew, peppering light kisses along your inner thighs until your eyes had fluttered open again, searching for him blearily in the darkness.
He appeared almost smug, smiling contentedly as he kissed his way back up your body, lathing his tongue over marks that he had left on his way down. He worked slowly, his hands sliding up your sides and coming to fondle your breasts greedily, rolling your nipples between his fingers whilst he ran his sinful tongue over your damp skin.
By the time he reached your lips, you were whining and bucking against the mattress once again, still not quite satiated after all of the pleasure he had given you. Lying atop you like this, his cock pulsed with need between your bodies, and the slight twitch of him was all it took to get you going again.
"Do you think you can handle one more?" He murmured against your lips, his hips rocking against your stomach, staining your skin with pearls of precum.
"Yes, gods, yes. Please, Luc, need to feel you." Your words came out as desperate sobs, and he breathed a shaky exhale as he leaned his weight onto his elbows above your shaking body.
"Archons…" Diluc whispered, his head dipping into the crook of your neck to nibble softly at the skin there. "You are simply irresistible."
Quickly, he aligned himself with your entrance, running the warm head of his cock through your folds to collect the combination of your juices and his saliva, before pressing it against your tight hole with a groan.
The stretch of him, so thick and hard as he pushed his way into your cunt, was almost more than you could handle this soon after such an intense orgasm. His pelvis ground up against your clit when he bottomed out, stuffing you full with his aching cock whilst you cried out for him.
He held himself there for a few moments, short, gasping breaths leaving his parted lips as he steadied himself. The lushness of your walls wrapped around him was too delicious to be over so soon.
"I promise, I'll never leave you alone again." He whispered, fixing his gaze on your cock-drunk expression as he delivered one slow thrust into your heat.
"I'll keep you satisfied from now on, my love. Never going to let you go without my touch again. I'll dedicate my whole life to you, okay? You'll never be lonely again, I swear."
Diluc was babbling unconsciously with every thrust he gave, all sweet words and promises in a deep, velvety voice that pushed you further into those blissful feelings.
All you could do was moan and sob incoherently in response, tears of ecstasy wetting your lashes as the shivers running up and down your spine grew more and more violent, wracking through your body in tremorous waves in time with every wet slap of his hips against yours.
Strong hands found their way under your hips, lifting them off the mattress slightly so that he could press your thighs upwards and practically fold you in half against the mattress. The tip of his cock reached even deeper inside you in this new position, and your walls pulsed around him in response to the intense sensations.
"Archons, you feel too good…" He moaned, leaning down to lathe the sensitive skin of your neck in hot, sloppy kisses that were so unlike the tender way he usually kissed you. "Gonna cum for me again, love?"
Frantically, you nodded. The invisible string in your stomach tightened until your entire body felt like a piece of elastic ready to snap as his pace only grew more animalistic. White blind spots began to grow in your vision with every invasion of his thick length into your aching hole, and your symphony of moans were surely waking up the maids on the other side of the mansion by now.
"Gonna fill you up, my love. Gonna cum so deep, you'll always have me in you." Diluc growled. His pace was faltering, each drag of his cock inside you losing their rhythm but gaining strength in his wild desperation.
Your responding whine was music to his ears, and he panted hot breaths against the sweat-slick skin of your throat.
"Luc, 'm gonna cum-" Your words came out slurred, as though drunk on the pleasure. Even your eyes could hardly stay open, so overwhelmed with extraordinary pleasure that every muscle inn your body seemed to be clenched tight.
"Me too, fuck- cum for me, darling. Let me feel you, need to feel you." He groaned, sinking his teeth into the column of your throat. "Cum for me, and I'll give you everything."
That was all it took to send you crashing over the edge into impossible pleasure. Your back arched and a loud scream of ecstasy tore out of your throat. Wetness coated his stomach as you squirted with the force of it, finally pushing him over the edge until he was crashing down to his own climax. Diluc let out a loud moan at the same time as yours, and your synchronised cries of pleasure filled the once silent Winery with the sound of your devotion.
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